Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 3 months ago (March 20, 2007 - 1 Nisan, 5767)

Looking at this journal, it seems that the last time I updated, I stopped right before Vacation. So, I guess I shall pick up there, to the best of my ability.

Thursday, January 25 - After sleeping to recover from my vacation, I began packing for Kibbutz. We’re not talking extreme packing - more of the preliminary unpacking from vacation, so as to make room in the suitcases for real packing. I then spent time updating my journal, which I have obviously not done since then. I remember nothing else about the day. Not everyone was back from vacation, so whatever.

Friday, January 26 - Every cooking appliance was missing from the building upon waking. I called Yossi and Nahum, but neither answered. Eventually, I found out that they had been packed up to go south. This was an issue since I missed lunch and had no plans to eat Shabbat meals in the Chadar Ochel. I had to change that plan. Soon, Shoshana and Abi got back, on the same Sherut, and Goldschmidt and I met them at the gate. Sarah Lopatin had made a sign welcoming Reva and Emily back to Beit Nativ, but that meant that Abi was left out. No one made signs for anyone in Shoshana’s room. As a result, Goldschmidt made a cartoon with me and him welcoming back the two of them. It was an amusing sign, and I had Cinnamon J. Scudworth fingers. I went to dinner, and then went to sleep.

Saturday, January 27 - I woke up around 10 and then went back to sleep until 1. Aviva and Shoshana and I had a breakfast party. After Shabbat, I was psyched to go to Nahum’s band’s show, but first, I had to find dinner. Shoshana and Abi and Goldschmidt and I went to Tmol Shilshom to solve this problem. The prices were much higher than the last time, but I read some Etgar Karet stories.

After Tmol Shilshom, we went to Mike’s Place for Nahum’s band [Red and the Baldies]. The show was mostly covers, but it was a lot of fun. Mike’s Place has no cover charge, so they require you to buy an alcoholic drink. This is ridiculous, but it’s how they do business. Yosef, who absolutely refuses to touch even the slightest bit of alcohol (even for Kiddush), had an argument with them. I had a cosmopolitan.

Sunday, January 28 - Who knows what happened before lunch? Not me. But for lunch, I had a 600 gram burger from Burgers’ Bar. Actually, Goldschmidt and I both did so, because we wanted to challenge ourselves. Needless to say, it was the best idea of all time. Remember the invention of the wheel? Good idea. But this was better.

Afterwards, I went with Shoshana and Abi to Alana’s room to make roof-fish, our exciting Haifa discovery. We made tons of them while eating ice-cream. For a minute, Alana left, and Hillel entered with a balloon. He told me to put Alana’s phone in the balloon while he held the mouth open. I did so, and he blew up and tied the balloon, and then put it under her bed. When she came back, he called her. She looked for her phone, saw the balloon, knocked it away in her search and then realized what had been done. It was quite amusing.

Monday, January 29 - The day started with 7:15 t’filot, as we were to begin “Israel Today Seminar,” a meeting with all the extreme viewpoints of the country. After breakfast, we went to Gush Etzion, a settlement in the West Bank, very close to Jerusalem. We went to Kfar Etzion, a religious kibbutz in the settlement. We met with Bob Lang, a settler, who tried to convince us that his way of life was good, though he was a poor speaker. We then slept through a movie about Gush Etzion. After this presentation, we ate lunch and then went to Mea Shearim, an ultra-Orthodox neighborhood in J town. We met the principal of a girls’ seminary, Yehoshua Rosenberg, who showed us around and then spoke to us. He actually tried to convince us that he was doing his national service by having 12 children instead of serving in the army - 12 children who will also not serve and who will also live off of government welfare.

After getting back to Beit Nativ, Yossi spoke to our group. See, because of the civil war in Gaza, we could not go to Kibbutz Sa’ad for the second half of the year. We found this out and began learning about our new home, Kibbutz Ein Tzurim.

After that, we had free time, due to the Foreign Minister of Israel not appearing for a lecture he was supposed to deliver.

Tuesday, January 30 - We began in Tel Aviv, at the Holon children’s museum for an exhibit called “Dialogue in the Dark,” in which we experienced blindness in a completely dark environment. It was actually quite interesting, except that our guide was very obnoxious. I later found out that the other guides made up cool stories about where we were (jungle, street, bar, boat, and music room were all separate rooms) - ours was just loud.

After that, we went to the dance center in Neve Tzedek. We ate sandwiches and listened to a speaker from the ultra left-wing “Shalom Achshav” (Peace Now) movement. Needless to say, she proposed ridiculous things and even went as far as to say that Israel started the six-day war in a surprise attack. I’ve heard these things from anti-Zionists in the US, but never from an Israeli. I decided to create a movement called “Ooga Machar, Shalom Machrotayim” (Cake Tomorrow, Peace The Next Day).

Then we saw a performance from the Inbal dance troupe, which was ridiculous. They seemed like they were having fun, but the dancing was not good, and frankly, it was boring. We then left to go to the Palmach museum, a museum celebrating the history of one of Israel’s multiple pre-Independence resistant movements. The museum was set up in a performance style, without actual exhibits, forcing us to follow a ludicrous story in a multimedia presentation.

After that, we went to a mall in Tel Aviv to eat dinner. I had chinese, and then we went back to Jerusalem, where I completed my packing process.

Wednesday, January 31 - To begin the day, we went to the Theodor Herzl museum on Mt Herzl. I have been there before, and it’s another Palmach-style museum. It’s, in my opinion, much better, even though it has even less to do with Herzl. The reason that it is better is that in many rooms, it has real seats! And that means nap-time.

After Herzl-rama began Kibbutz orientation, a fancy way of calling a continuation of Monday’s discussion. Following that (and lunch) was the third in a series of really bad museums, this one celebrating everyone’s favorite Prime Minister, Menachem Begin! Yes, it actually was in the same style as the other two museums, and no, we had not come around to enjoying that style.

So of course, after those exciting days, we were more than happy to board a bus for one hour to go plant a tree for five minutes before turning around on the bus. When we got to Ne’ot Kedumim for the tree-planting extravaganza, Lily Tomlin boarded the bus (if it wasn’t actually her, then she has an Israeli twin…) and told us about the area, the mitzvah of planting trees (as if we had not all planted trees since we first could hold a spade), and the rapidly approaching Tu B’shvat. We planted our trees, sat in a cave, received certificates, and left.

After dinner, we had a Karaoke celebration. It was alright. Mainly, it consisted of Teppy singing songs that he probably should not sing - that is, any song. At one point, Nahum and Yossi sang a duet of “Mustang Sally,” which meant that Nahum sang while Yossi stood there for a while, occasionally mouthing one or two words.

Thursday, February 1 - We began the day on a bus going to Givat Haviva, an institute dedicated to coexistence. First, we met with a guy who talked to us, occasionally slipping an expletive or two into a sentence, about the area. Then we met an Israeli Arab, who basically spent the time telling us why Iran was right to seek the nuclear bomb, and potentially nuke the world. We then boarded our bus with David (the first guy) to go to view the (unviewable, as it does not actually exist) green line. He spoke to us more, and he was quite interesting. Many people did not listen to him at points, missing out on valuable commentary, such as, “So I say, f*** the Wadi Arah,” and, “I had to install a safety room in my house. Cost me a f***ing ton! Guy comes over to inspect it and says, ‘Relax, when I inspect Arab villages, they have one window, they sit me down for coffee after I view it, then they uninstall it and run over to put it into the next house.” Needless to say, the man was amusing.

Friday, February 2 - To start off the day, I awoke. I then walked around Emek Refaim with Shoshana until she had to go to Talpiyot, to which I had no desire to go. Instead, I went back and cleaned my room, as it was time to turn it over into a useable room again.

Because it was a closed Shabbat, we were all on base together. Services were at Moreshet Yisrael, and we celebrated the Bat Mitzvah of Mari-Ann Sartin-Tarm! It was fun and festive. Because it was Tu B’shvat, with dinner we had a Tu B’shvat seder, which meant four types of fruit: Almonds (inedible shell), Dates (inedible pit), Avocados (both), and Raisins (neither). During dinner, Goldschmidt taught what is possibly the greatest song of all time. It is about the singer’s friend, who is a tree, and has verses such as this:

On my birthday,
We dance and sing,
On his birthday,
He grows a ring!

After dinner, I joined a large group on floor -3 for a game of Battle of the Sexes, which was clearly dominated by the males. This is because of the combination of Goldschmidt and me, whose combined mental prowess is bar none. Also we both seem to know a lot about “female subjects.”

Saturday, February 3 - So Mari-Ann read the Haftarah and Maftir quite well, and that was nice. Luckily, Annie acted as rabbi for these parts, so we didn’t have to deal with Frank (the normal rabbi at MY, who, frankly, is not the nicest man).

After lunch, I napped before Mincha. After Havdalah, Jeff, Leora, Shoshana, and I decided to go to Burgers Bar, to relive old times. We planned to go to both Burgers Bars, but it was raining really badly, so after eating on Shammai, we came back to Beit Nativ and ordered Soya to increase our gluttony and celebrate our last day in Jerusalem.

Sunday, February 4 - So Sunday began our second Negev Tiyul: this one was not “Wilderness Survival” themed, yet it was still very fun. When we woke up, we moved all our luggage to the storage room, in the pouring rain. We did the last-minute room cleanup and boarded the busses at 10. Due to the very heavy rain, there were massive mud-slides all over the Negev, and we could not hike the hike we had wanted to do. Instead of offering three options, we all had to do one option together, yet it was still a nice hike. In addition, the mud poured into the Dead Sea, which provided for some very cool pictures. These and others from the tiyul can be found here.

Our hike was through Nachal David, my favorite spot in the country, so that was nice. After the hike, we boarded the busses to go to Mamshit, the Bedouin Tent place. I have been there before, and it seems that so has most of Nativ. Yet, we went back. I am not complaining - the food is fantastic, and we my eating group of four consumed three whole trays of the meat and stuff. Afterwards, I turned in for an early night, as I was to be awakening soon after.

At 1:30, I was awoken by Avram, according to plan, for the Superbowl. The best part about watching a Superbowl on a projection screen in a Bedouin Tent at 2 in the morning is still the commercials. The commercials were not normal American ones, but rather, ridiculous ESPN International ones that featured things such as “Amazing Games” (Including Bull-Racing, and Caning) and “This Day in Sports.” Unfortunately, these commercials repeated excessively.

Monday, February 5 - After davening, we had breakfast. Since there were bagels, I took the initiative to ask the Bedouin oven-user to use his oven to toast my bagel. He allowed me to do so. Yum.

Many people rode camels after that. I do not ride camels. I have done it once before, and it’s not easy on the groinal area, so I opted out.

Soon, those of us who chose to do the advanced hike of the day got on a bus to go pay homage to Lot’s wife (a giant pillar of salt, to this day) at Mt. Sodom. The hike was quite good, and provided some great views of the area.

After the hike, we were supposed to go to the sand dunes. I hate the sand dunes. Not a “that place sucks” kind of hatred, but rather a “I swear I will have vengeance” kind of hatred. You see, a year and a half ago, while at the same dunes on Etgar, the dunes killed my beloved Canon Zoom 70 camera. That was the best point-and-shoot camera I’ve ever encountered, and it served me well for many years. One day, I will buy the sand dunes and destroy them!

Anyway, we didn’t make it to the dunes, thankfully, because of a delay with the other group. Instead, we went straight to Kibbutz Ketura, another of my least favorite places on the planet. This is also because of another bad Etgar experience which has scarred me for life. I don’t want to talk about it.

Luckily, we left Ketura quickly to go to a hippie kibbutz called Yotam. At Yotam, I took a shiatsu and chi-kong class. Both are crazy. Neither seem useful in international trade agreements, but I could be wrong.

Tuesday, February 6 - The day began with a learners’ minyan led by Nahum, which is always preferable to normal Shacharit, due to something I like to call “élan.” Actually, the French call it that. I call it pizzazz.

The only good part about Ketura is the frothed milk machine. I recall this machine from my last time there, and I made use of it again. Mmm frothed milk. After breakfast, we all split into different groups to do different art things. I chose the decoupage group and got to make a sweet pot with tons of cool pictures on it.

After that, everyone joined together to present the different things each group had done. Clearly, our pots were the finest items present. After this, we were scheduled to go to another hike, but instead went to the dunes. Grr. After the sand torture, we left for Eilat.

Upon arriving in Eilat, we got to the Adi hotel, where we were staying for two days. I showered before going down to meet with the Kibbutz group to learn about our jobs. I signed up for Gardening, followed by English, and then Agriculture. Dinner was not good.

Afterwards, I joined Ross and Emily and Dan Goldstein for a movie at a nearby theatre, because there’s nothing else to do in Eilat at night. The movie was called Chaos and featured Wesley Snipes and was absolutely horrible.

Wednesday, February 7 - The day began with the hardest hike offered, Har Shlomo, a mountain that overlooks Israel, Egypt, Jordan, and Saudi Arabia. Naturally, I was in. Unfortunately, this meant waking up for 6:15 t’filot. The hike is allegedly one of the hardest in Israel, and the view is allegedly one of the greatest. Both of these allegations are true. Uphill and Downhill were both tough, but it was worth it.

We then went to the Hallelujah restaurant in Eilat, and I ate some kind of meat thing. It wasn’t very good. We then went back to the hotel to prepare to go to the beach. Which we did. I read for a while on the beach and then went back to the hotel for a nap. Afterwards, Abi and Ilana and I went to Eilat’s Big Apple Pizza for pizza!

Thursday, February 8 - After Shacharit and breakfast, it was time for the tiyul to end and Kibbutz life to begin. We got on our bus, and began Apocalypse Now as a film to ease the long journey to Kibbutz Ein Tzurim.

Upon arriving at Kibbutz, we got to our caravans, built our shelves, found our bags, and began creating our new home. I was missing a box, my box of popcorn, and I was less than thrilled.

My caravan is Joey and I on one side and Tani and Jacob on the other. In between is a common room with two couches and a sink and microwave and fridge. We also have a water kettle, but as soon as it’s plugged in, the power in the whole caravan goes out, so we have to get a new one.

I immediately hung my roof-fish on my ceiling and filled the walls with my articles and posters. I would have put my flags on the ceiling, but they are in my popcorn box.

Friday, February 9 - Upon waking, we all went to the Chadar Ochel (dining hall) for breakfast, which consisted of eggs and more eggs. There was also pudding. Still, we saw few actual kibbutz members.

After breakfast, we met with a Hebrew-speaking Kibbutznik who gave us a tour of the place without English. Naturally, I did not listen very well, as I was relying on translation from others. I did managed to learn that Ein Tzurim used to be in Gush Etzion, but moved in 1948.

Our caravan area is near other guest houses, close to the chadar ochel, and not far from the dairy and turkey area, which explains the smell. It is also very close to the children’s area and the laundry area, as well as “The Bottle Tree” a building which was not explained well. Something about lemons. [A month later, I’m still not sure what the heck they have in there.]

On the other side of the Kibbutz, near the Gush Katif area (former residents of Gaza were relocated in 2005 to other areas, including right next to the Kibbutz), is the Yeshiva of the Kibbutz and the “Herzog Center” which has some form of learning opportunities. In the center of the kibbutz is the synagogue. Not so exciting. On the end of the kibbutz nearest to us, there are fields which service multiple kibbutzim and moshavim.

Lunch was spaghetti. This is because although most lunches are meat, Friday lunch is dairy. Joy. Soon, we prepared for Shabbat. Instead of going to the boring Kibbutz synagogue, we decided to go to the Yeshiva minyan, which was to be Carlebach-style, and therefore much better. It wasn’t that great. The guy leading the service kept repeating everything we had just done, so that we got lost several times. But that’s Orthodoxy.

Upon leaving, it was raining. We ran to dinner and did Kiddush. We then waited thirty minutes for the soup to come. This is because, for some odd reason, we were being served by people. After the soup, it took an additional 30 minutes to receive anything else, and 30 minutes more to receive the meat. After a two-hour-long dinner, we sang and benched birkat.

After that, I decided to turn in early, which I did.

Saturday, February 10 - T’filot in the morning were in the boring synagogue. They were boring, but very fast. After two hours, they were finished. Lunch was at 10:30. At the end of lunch, 12:30, we had parve ice cream. It was the highlight of the meal.

We then met another Kibbutz member, named David, who spoke English! He told us about his life and how he came to become part of the Kibbutz and about the Kibbutz. We then had Mincha and free time, which I spent playing catch with Abi, as she brought a softball and gloves. At one point, the ball went under a caravan. We could not reach it. Nadav could! Nadav is Yossi’s three-year-old, and is possibly the cutest kid ever. He saved the day and then played with Tani.

Then came Seudah Shlishit, which was not bad. There was this odd noodle concoction that was quite good. Then Ma’ariv and Havdalah ended Shabbat. Then we had a meeting to find out our jobs. I was assigned to teach English at Be’er Tuvia, the local regional high-school, with Joey, Andy, and Teppy.

Sunday, February 11 - Because Be’er Tuvia was not ready for us, the four of us had to work in the kitchen for the day. I spent an hour and a half cutting potatoes, which is not fun. In addition, at one point, I had to wash carrots. I was to put the 15-kilo bags of carrots [33 pounds] into a 4-foot high machine that spun them around while mixing them with water. Basically, it washes and peels them at the same time. The water and peel mixture pours out of a tube in the back into a small trench with a large drain at the end. Nevertheless, the drain clogs. I had to constantly insert this hose to unclog it while it clogged. At one point, I had finished unclogging it, stood up, and a carrot flew out of the machine and hit me in the face.

Then we ate lunch, which was meaty and was great. Later, I made schnitzels with Andy and this Israeli guy. After work, lots of us sat around sluggishly, and this is when I discovered “Flavor of Love,” Flavor Flav’s Reality TV show on Yes Stars. At one point, this contestant spit into the face of another, and Joey and I cracked up. Luckily, Yes Stars replayed that scene several times.

Then, Rivka, the woman who is in charge of us at Be’er Tuvia, came to meet us on the Kibbutz. She was 42 minutes late. We were not happy.

I then went to bed early. I was exhausted.

Monday, February 12 - Our day began on the way to Be’er Tuvia. Our bus driver was named Rimon. We talked to him, and found out that he was supposed to be our bus driver for every day, but might not be. We met up with Rivka and planned out our week. We went into a few classrooms and played 20 questions in English to have them determine something about us, and then we had a schnitzel-in-baguette lunch.

After work, we came back and chilled around for a while. There’s not an excessive amount of things to do on kibbutz, so it seems much of our time is spent loafing. Luckily, I’m very skilled at loafing and once won an award for 1st place loafer.

Tuesday, February 13 - Yom Nativ today. Usually, Yamei Nativ are going to be on Mondays, but for some reason, this one was on Tuesday. Nahum came down from J-lem and led the day. He sat us in a circle and we talked about our most Israeli moments and funniest moments in J town and then filled out new goal sheets for kibbutz, after receiving our goal sheets we had written in Week 1 of Nativ. We then created new committees.

After lunch, I boarded a bus for people going to Jerusalem for Ramah interviews. After dealing with the Ramah bureaucracy, I did my laundry at Beit Nativ and then joined Abi for dinner at Big Apple Pizza before heading back to Kibbutz.

Wednesday, February 14 - More 20 questions in Be’er Tuvia. We also met with 12th graders and talked to them one on one, as they are going to be interviewed in English for their diplomas. The diploma in question is called the “Bagrut” and is not required. You will go to the army after high school regardless of whether you have it or not. It comes in multiple varieties, some of which don’t include English. After the army, you have to take another test called the Psychometry before you can go to University, if you want to do so. So I don’t understand why anyone would bother with the Bagrut.

We also began to discuss a Purim play to be done with the 7th graders. And we went to the library to see how it was structured.

Nothing exciting occurred after work.

Thursday, February 15 - Another normal day of work. This is unexciting. What is exciting is the dinner that we were served in the evening: Pancakes. These pancakes, were one to sell them, would sell like hot-cakes. They were so good. Yum! After dinner, I went to Tzomet Malachi to go to Be’er Sheva. I got to Be’er Sheva, visited for a while, and then went to sleep in Yonit’s bed. (Yonit was on Kibbutz and told me I could use her bed that night.)

Friday, February 16 - When I awoke, Debbie and I went to the bus station to go to Jerusalem. When we got there, we walked around the city for a while until we decided to go to the Inbal Hotel on Jabotinsky St. See, there was a Houston Pilgrimage thing, and they invited all of the students of Houston in Israel (including me and Debbie) to spend Shabbat with them.

The food was amazing! The Inbal Hotel is the place to be. I slept much of the time.

Saturday, February 17 - Lunch was also fantastic. An open buffet with tons of meat. TONS. After Seudah Shlishit and Havdalah, I left the hotel and went to the bus station. While there, a drunk man came and yelled at two women. Security removed him.

I got back to Kibbutz and watched “The Departed” in order to prepare for the Oscars.

Sunday, February 18 - Work as usual. We began working with the 7th graders on the Purim play. Basically nothing else happened. Sunday is boring. But we stay up late because Monday is Yom Nativ. So that means plenty of high-quality loafing!

Monday, February 19 - Yom Nativ the Second. We began with tons of photos on the ground. We had to go to the one that we liked most. I chose Avigdor Lieberman, because he’s crazy and amusing. After that standard program, we split up into groups to plan future Yamei Nativ. I am on the Pesach group, so that should be fun.

Clearly this was the worst Yom Nativ ever. It began with a boring program we’ve done a million times, and progressed into us being told what to plan for the future. The idea that they explained to us is that this way, we’ll be able to feel as if we planned something - almost as if none of us has ever been involved in planning anything ever before. In reality, it seemed as if we were being told to do the work that the counselors didn’t want to do.

After that obnoxiousness, we went to the soccer field, where most of us did not play soccer. Teppy threw up. This is because soccer was right after lunch. Basically, the staff dropped the ball on this Yom Nativ. Afterwards, a bunch of us got together to watch Little Miss Sunshine, another Oscar-nominated film. It was lots of fun, and Alan Arkin cracked me up.

Tuesday, February 20 - After another day of work, a bunch of us joined in to watch Babel, the third in our series of Best Picture-nominees. Really nothing else happened for the rest of the day. The days are getting more and more boring, but this is to be expected.

Wednesday, February 21 - Another normal day of work. Afterwards, Shoshana and I went to Be’er Sheva to join Alana, Cynthia, Sam, Arielle, Elanna, and Julia for dinner. In order to get to Be’er Sheva, we didn’t take an Egged bus, but instead found a new bus company, Metropoline. It was far cheaper and I was therefore thrilled. Anyway, dinner was Pita Pizza and Salad and Cheesecake. I made the salad and dressing, so it was the first good salad I’d had since leaving home. (I made the dressing we made at home.) The evening was great, and we all decided to make it a regular Wednesday thing.

Thursday, February 22 - After work, I came back and waited around Kibbutz for the HeChalutzim kids. Shoshana and I planned to meet Yonit in Tel Aviv, so after the HeChalutzim kids arrived and explored kibbutz, the two of us left. We got to Tel Aviv and after a long journey, arrived at the Youth Hostel. The three of us then walked to this neat port area where we had dinner at Max Brenner, the Chocolatier. After dinner, we went to bed, as it was quite late.

Friday, February 23 - We woke up early so as to explore TA town. First, we went to Nachalat Binyamin, an artist’s market, where I bought a small ceramic owl. Afterwards, we explored other marketplaces and the beach and then got on a bus to go back home and spend Shabbat on Kibbutz.

After getting back, we went to dinner, which was as slow as expected, and then many of us played Nativ-Apples-to-Apples before going to bed.

Saturday, February 24 - I spent most of the day sleeping. I ate lunch, and then walked around for 5 hours, the first time I had had real thinking time in a long time. It was helpful and I thought about my life over the past 5 years, before making some big decisions and then going to bed.

Sunday, February 25 - I decided that school was not for me. I want to do something physical, on Kibbutz, and, if possible, outdoors. I talked to Yael about switching jobs, and she said she’d see what she could do. After work, many of us watched part of The Queen and a few other films including the Oscar-nominated Animated Shorts and also, West Bank Story, a live-action short about two falafel stands. We then went to bed early.

At 3 AM, Abi and our caravan woke up to watch the Oscars. At 7, we went back to bed for one hour.

Monday, February 26 - Yom Nativ today was organized by a group of Nativers. It was about “World Heritage” and the Kibbutz movement. Basically, we had filled out emails earlier in the week about our family and from where they came, and it linked to everything.

A world map was drawn on the whiteboard, surprisingly well, if you disregard the annexation of Baja California by the US and the destruction of Florida by forces unknown. In addition, countries were listed on the board, though many were no longer correct as of the current geopolitical status of this island Earth.

The group in charge then read all of the stories we had submitted and we all guessed to whom each story belonged. We then had another speaker from Kibbutz, again only in Hebrew, who basically told us the same story that we’d heard twenty times prior.

We then found out that we would get Kibbutz families in the next few days. This was pleasing to the ear. We were paired up, and Abi and I are “siblings.” Finally, we had to make skits representing the various immigration periods in Israel.

Tuesday, February 27 - We spent time in school doing the normal school activities. The purim play is coming along, but we all doubted it would finish by Purim.

When I got back to Kibbutz, I found out that Matan sprained his finger and Shosh got hit in the head with a pipe. Although school isn’t the best job, it’s certainly the least dangerous!

Wednesday, February 28 - After normal boring work activities, I packed up to go to Be’er Sheva for the second week in a row. Shoshana joined me and we got on the bus at Tzomet Malachi. Around Qiryat Gat (about fifteen minutes from TM), a whole group of kids boarded the bus and sat on each other and in the aisles.

Upon arriving in Be’er Sheva, I hit up SuperPharm to find hair rubber-bands, but was unsuccessful. Luckily, when we got to the Mercaz Klitah, Julia had some. We all decided to make baked potatoes and went to the supermarket to purchase some goods. When we got back, we waited for the other half of the apartment to arrive. Meanwhile, Angela came over and began preparing my hair in cornrows for my Purim costume.

Eventually everyone got back, and instead of baked potatoes, we made mashed potatoes, which were great. Soon, David arrived with his mom. His mom asked what was going on with my hair (which was not complete) and I explained my Purim costume:

David’s mom: What are you going to be?
Me: Flavor Flav!
DM: Which Flavor?
Me: There’s only one Flavor Flav!

Then David’s mom gave us a ride home, since they were also going there. David’s mom spent the majority of the ride yelling at him, including when her husband nearly missed a red light, as if David somehow were controlling the driving.

Thursday, March 1 - At work, we began discussing how we would build a curriculum around “Keeping the Faith.” I announced that todaywould be my last day in class.

After school, Angela arrived to finish my hair. It looked amazing, and I began preparing my costume. I borrowed a jersey from Teppy and cut a cane out of some kind of cane-like plant near one of the caravans. I also bought some tin-foil (I had already purchased a clock a few days back) for various accessories, including grills and rings.

Then, Abi and I went to our host-home. We met our “parents” who both speak English. The wife is an administrator of some form on the Kibbutz, and the husband works in Jerusalem, hunting people on the internet.

Upon arriving back at the caravans, we made Wacky Mac, since we had missed dinner. Yum!

Friday, March 2 - Friday allowed me a late wake-up, until it was time to prepare for Shabbat. It was a closed Shabbat, so everything was organized on Kibbutz. We went to t’filot and then had dinner at the Chadar Ochel. As last time, dinner took forever. This is disappointing.

After dinner, we had a program about Purim and Mishloach Manot. The program was boring.

Saturday, March 3 - After Shacharit, Abi and I went to our host home for lunch. It was great! We had cholent with tons of meat, and schnitzel, and other great goodies. Mmm!

We had Mincha and Se’udah Shlishit outside, which was nice, and after Havdalah, we began preparing our costumes. I finished making my cane, got a goblet from Andy, which I covered in foil, and made my grills and rings. I then took a comforter and made it into a cape. I was set.

Among the other Kibbutz costumes were Snow White (Reva), Starsky & Hutch (Joey and Tani), Quailman (Teppy), Matan (Aviva), Aviva (Matan), Wilma Flintstone (Hanna), The Devil Wears Prada (Phil), Butterflies (Sarah and Molly), and Teenage Angst (Abi).

All my pictures from purim (and the aftermath of my hair once I removed the cornrows) can be found here.

We all went to the Yeshiva for the Megilla reading. The Yeshiva had been decorated to look like an Iranian terrorist cell, including a picture of Tel Aviv being nuked. Israeli humor is not so funny.

After the very late busses arrived filled with K1 and K2, we began our Purim party in the Red Mo’adon. After much hubbub and an engagement announcement about Jesse, one of our Madrichim, the party eventually ended and everyone went to bed.

Sunday, March 4 - We started the day with a Purim meal, at which Gabe recited my favorite Purim Kiddush. We played a trite mixer that everyone has seen approximately forty bajillion times before, and then we sat down and ate. In addition, we gave Mishloach Manot packages to our “Purim Buddies.” My buddy was Aviva, and I gave her, among other things, popcorn from my personal stash, since she loves popcorn almost as much as me.

After this meal, Abi and I left for Jerusalem via bus. Upon arriving in the city, we went around our favorite places and chilled in Gan Ha’atzmaut for a while. After a while, when we realized we still had plenty of time before we had to go somewhere, we went down to Talpiyot and saw “The Last King of Scotland” at the Rav Chen, which was great.

We then left the theatre and went to Emek Refaim to meet Abi’s friend, Robbie, at whose house we were staying that evening for Shushan Purim. [In Israel, every holiday (except Rosh Hashana) is one day shorter. Purim, however, is one day longer, since Shushan Purim is the day after and is celebrated in J-lem.] When we got there, there was already a party in full swing, but soon, twelve people left, leaving only Robbie and Rob and one or two others. Soon, we found out that Robbie didn’t actually know any of those people, but they were in the neighborhood. We joined Robbie and Rob on the way to Shushan, a gay bar in Jerusalem, but the cover was too high, so we left and went by the Shuk, where a party was in full swing, in the middle of the shuk, after midnight. Ridiculous.

After all kinds of running around, we went back to Robbie’s house and slept. Sarah and Koby were also sleeping there.

Monday, March 5 - When we awoke in the afternoon, we joined Robbie for his daily soap opera (a Hebrew soap opera about some army band - it was ridiculous). We then left for Hillel street, where there was a big outdoor celebration. There were all kinds of goings-on, but we were waiting for Hadag Nachash, who would be playing much later.

So we went to Beit Nativ and dropped our bags off with Michael, who of course said he’d put them into the back room, due to his intense awesomeness. We then went back to Hillel and waited around a while, during multiple performances, until Hadag Nachash finally began performing. Once they did, we got to hear three songs before we had to leave for the bus station.

We got to the bus station and still had a few minutes to walk around, so we bought a much-needed hot plate and then boarded our bus. Eventually, we got back to Kibbutz after a very fun Shushan Purim.

Tuesday, March 6 - I began work today in the Chadar Ochel. I cut tons of potatoes and spent hours making schnitzel. I did not fry the schnitzel, I breaded it. Fun. But I’ve been assured that this job is temporary until a better job has been found for me.

After work, we all had a session with Yossi, who talked to us about various Kibbutz-related things including how terrible the dinners are. Afterwards, I talked to Yossi about my job situation and about my Pesach plans. He said he’d help with both. [I wanted to go hiking for Pesach but need equipment and a plan.]

After that, we started this “Kibbutz Chevruta” thing, in which a teacher from the Yeshiva came to teach us. It was a good class.

Wednesday, March 7 - Work in the Chadar continued. I cut potatoes, made schnitzel, etc. This is tedious.

Afterwards, I was feeling very sick, so I did not go to Be’er Sheva. I napped for a while in my ill state, and did nothing.

Thursday, March 8 - After work, Mike Landes arrived on Kibbutz, as he was planning to stay the weekend. A few of us chilled out for a while, and basically nothing happened.

The day wasn’t boring, just uneventful.

Friday, March 9 - When I woke up, I went to the Kol-Bo to prepare for my weekend: Sleeping on the beach. However, Abi’s bus (she was on Kibbutz Ketura the night before) was late, so she got back right before Shabbat, so we had to scrap our plans and stay on Kibbutz. But this meant that Caravan Six and Mike Landes would have a great Shabbat. And we did.

We went to the Kibbutz Synagogue, which was alright, and then went to dinner, which was slow as could be expected. Then Mike, Abi, Joey, Tani, and I all hanged out for a while.

Saturday, March 10 - After Shabbat, which was very relaxed, I thought about packing for the coming week, “Leadership Week.” However, I realized I was almost out of clothing, so I decided to take my laundry bag instead of another bag, and just do my laundry in Jerusalem. I also packed up a backpack.

A few of us then watched Grosse Pointe Blank, one of the greatest films ever. And then we slept.

Sunday, March 11 - We woke up and got ready for a bus that was to arrive at 9:30. It arrived at 10:30. We started driving and got to Tzomet Malachi, where I got some McDonald’s French Fries. We then drove for a few more minutes before the bus broke down. Eventually, another bus came, and we got on that bus.

We got to Jerusalem and found out that since we were all late, we were mostly in the same group (they shuffled the groups around) and we wouldn’t miss any programming. First, we had lunch. Ah, how I miss Beit Nativ lunches. I mean, Kibbutz lunches are also quite good, and the rest of the food at both places is abominable, but Beit Nativ lunches are unlimited! [On Kibbutz, we can only take a certain amount of meat.] Anyway, lunch was wings, which is the best possible Beit Nativ lunch, so it compounded awesomeness.

After lunch, we met with this guy whose session was entitled “Thinking outside the box.” It was alright, but trite. We had to come up with an electrical appliance that our brains resemble. I chose the subwoofer, as I am loud, but no one really knows what’s going on inside.

After that, everyone met with Ze’ev Bielski, the leader of the Jewish Agency. He wants you to visit Israel. He told me to tell you. No really, he actually said, “tell people that Ze’ev Bielski told you that he wants them to visit Israel.” So I have done.

Then, our group met with Neil Lazarus, the amusing British guy whom I’ve seen twice before. The issue is this: the first time I saw him, I was bored. He crammed stupid jokes into a short presentation. The second time, a year later, it was much better - he had the same amount of jokes, but four times the amount of time, and therefore, much more information came through. This time, he spoke about public speaking, and it was alright - somewhere between the last two performances.

After this was dinner, which was nothing to write home about. Abi and Joey and I then left quickly to catch a Sherut to Tel Aviv. After paying our 20 shekels, we arrived in Tel Aviv and then got a cab to the Barbie, where we had tickets for Regina Spektor. What a great show! She played 24 songs and two encores, and she was absolutely amazing.

Afterwards, we got a ride from someone who was at the show heading toward Jerusalem. He took us back to the edge of the city, and we grabbed a cab back to Beit Nativ.

Monday, March 12 - After t’filot, we broke up into groups again. My group first went to Mark Lazar, the drama guy from an Erev Nativ oh-so-long-ago. This time, it was a session about Israel-related games, which of course was tons of fun, since Mark Lazar is clearly awesome. [This is my fourth encounter with the man. #2 was at Kol Haneshama, the Reform synagogue in J Town; #3 was in the Bedouin Tent, as he was leading some other group.]

After that, we went to a session called “Communication in Hadracha.” We began by playing a game. I had to leave during the game, however, as I had a doctor’s appointment at Wolfson. It was concerning my ever-unhealthy stomach. He told me that he thinks my Gastroentiritis left my stomach in a state from which it has yet to recover, so he gave me a prescription for some pills. I got it filled, then went back to Beit Nativ.

I managed to make it in time for David Keren’s session about Midrash. It was also a pretty good session. We then had to choose which Advisor-led sessions we wanted to go to. I chose Julie’s, Nahum’s, and Yossi’s, based entirely on who taught them and not on content. Julie’s session was about discipline and was quite good, although very redundant.

At dinner, I asked Nahum what I should do for the evening and he suggested I go to a Gilbert and Sullivan operetta directed by his father. Naturally, I considered this to be the greatest idea of all time. Goldschmidt and Shoshana joined me. We walked to the Hirsch Theatre, and paid for our tickets. The show was awesome! Definitely a great choice.

Tuesday, March 13 - Immediately following breakfast, we boarded busses to go to Ma’ale Hachamisha, a hotel at which I stayed during Pilgrimage ‘04. It’s a nice place, and it flooded me with memories. Anyway, my first session was Nahum’s, about the Four Sons. We discussed different options about the sons and what they represent and eventually came to the conclusion that perhaps we are all four sons at different times.

After that, I had Yossi’s session about incorporating Israel in programming of various forms. It was an alright session, but I feel as if I’ve done exactly that for the last three years or more.

We then had lunch, which was fantabulous! The variety was almost as great as the desserts! Also, Jules arrived! It was good to see him, and I conversed with him for a while. Then we had some free time while another group met with Jules. Then we met with Jules. The session was about being a dugma in relation to leadership in camp environments.

Then we left Ma’ale Hachamisha, just as the rain came down full force. We boarded the bus and went on our way to Kibbutz Hanaton, the four-time winner of the official “Smelliest Kibbutz” award. When we got there, I was again flooded with a multitude of memories from Pilgrimage ‘04, as we had spent a week there that summer. I called Rachel Hilker, as I had not talked to her in months, and Hanaton is arguably where our friendship was cemented.

We then had dinner inside, due to the rain, and then everyone went to shower. After showering, I got some sleep.

Wednesday, March 14 - After t’filot (the learner’s minyan!), we had pancakes for breakfast. Yum! We then boarded the buses and went to Dani-hi, a site dedicated to things such as Paintball, Martial Arts, Rock Climbing, and stuff like that. We did all of those things. It was pretty awesome.

The best part was led by this Brazilian Martial Arts and Drumming expert. As a result, we drummed and martial-arted. These two things have nothing to do with each other, but both were quite good.

After finishing there, we returned to Hanaton, where it was again pouring, so we did not have a barbecue. This is sad. Instead, we ate barbecue foods inside.

Thursday, March 15 - The first thing we did in the morning was pack up. We then left, and went to Herzliya, a small suburb of Tel Aviv. We visited the Interdisciplinary Center (IDC), a University that offers degrees in English. It seemed like a nice place. Were I a different person, I might have considered going there. A lot of people did. One of the big selling points is that they have professors from Columbia, Harvard, and other major US Universities. Joey and I discussed this, saying that next year, all of our professors will be from Columbia.

We had a lecture from a teacher there, Uri Goldflam, about the peace-process, etc. It was nothing new. After lunch, we had another session with Jules, this time about Conservative Judaism in relation to an article by Neil Gillman. The article, which we read over the previous week, was very good and very thought-provoking.

After that, I boarded the Jerusalem bus to spend the evening in Jerusalem. Leadership week was done, and it was time to enter Shabbat.

Tani and I had decided to spend Shabbat together in Be’er Sheva, after a day in Jerusalem. We went to Beit Nativ and got a room with Corinne and Morgan. I then went with Joey to Big Apple Pizza for dinner. After that, I went back to Beit Nativ to meet Tani and go with him to get some falafel for his dinner. We then joined a group celebrating Alicia’s birthday. The group was: Alicia, Julia, Sam, Nathalie, Sarah Stein, Shosh Cohn, Jenni, Shayna Yellon and the two of us.

Friday, March 16 - After waking, Tani and I joined Julia and Jenni in shopping for dinner. After we got what we needed, we went to the bus station, and joined Sam, Shosh, and Shayna in our journey to Be’er Sheva.

When we got there, we began preparing dinner for ten: Julia, Sam, Cynthia, Arielle, Shayna, Shosh, Jenni, Alicia, Tani, and me. Shabbat began and we ate dinner: Chicken, Potatoes, Salad, and more. It was all quite excellent.

After dinner, we sang for a while and were joined by Jesse Gadon, Debbie, and Mari-Ann. We ate Marzipan rugelach and cinnamon-rolls. Mmm.

We hang out for a while, and for some reason, at midnight, Tani began singing Kabbalat Shabbat. Soon, six of us had joined in, and we davened KabShab after midnight, when it was technically already Saturday. It was odd yet amusing.

Saturday, March 17 - After a very late wake-up, a bunch of us ate cereal and laffas with jam. It was an interesting lunch, but a good one. Then a game of Cranium was organized, Julia, Cynthia and Sam versus Tani, Jenni, and me. Somehow, we lost. Still not sure how that happened.

After Shabbat ended, we hanged around for another hour and then left to go back to Kibbutz. Tani and Jenni and I got to the bus station and still had some time left, so Jenni went to SuperPharm. Just then, the bus came, and we panicked. Luckily, she made it back in time, and we got back to Kibbutz late at night before going to bed.

Sunday, March 18 - Back to normal work. Nothing exciting happened, except I began frying things with Yosef. This is good, because Yosef is a great frying buddy. I also organized chicken in rows on a pan. This is not good, because raw chicken covered in meat sauce is not fun to handle in large quantities.

After work, Abi and Joey and Jenni and Tani and I watched “So I Married an Axe Murderer” and then went to bed.

Monday, March 19 - Yom Nativ again! Jules and Yossi came, and Jules talked to us about our complaints and criticisms so as to aid them in future Nativ planning. After lunch, Avram took over as he had planned a mock-Knesset program. He planned it quite well and it was actually really good, but halfway through, when my coalition (I was the Finance Minister and part of the Labor party) was joking around about something, Mike freaked out and began yelling at us. Andy got angry because Mike was really being a terrible madrich, and so Andy left the program.

After Yom Nativ, I went back to my caravan, where Joey was sleeping, as he had a 103 fever. I watched some West Wing with Abi and then went to bed myself.

Tuesday, March 20 - Woke up with a very sore throat. I went to the Marp and they told me I had to wait two days for lab results (they swabbed my throat) before I could find out if I needed medicine. I also have no voice. I spent the day cleaning our very dirty (not anymore!) caravan, and organized things. I also finally caught up on this. After I post it, I’m going outside to join a barbecue (long overdue).

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 5 months ago (January 25, 2007 - 6 Shevat, 5767)

Sunday, December 10 through Sunday December 17 - Over the week, I accomplished quite a bit. I finished Yeshiva for the year, and explored more of Jerusalem. Because it was so long ago, I don’t have day-to-day summaries, but here are some highlights!

Microwave Rice Cooking! Because I joined my mom’s cooking forum, one of the members sent me a ‘microwave rice cooker,’ which was very generous. Shoshana and I used it to cook brown rice on the 11th, and the results were great! Pictures are online here.

Hanukkah Erev Nativ: Basically, Erev Nativ consisted of two major parts: discussion of the laws of Hanukkah (which I had learned in Yeshiva) and a Family Feud-type game designed by Phil and Shoshana. We also got Sufganiot (donuts). This was the best part, because although the FF game was well-designed and fun, no one was attentive or even respectful, which was only ridiculous. Later that night, we made Hanukkiot, and I made a tiled one. It looks nice.

Shabbat Dinner on Emek Refaim: For Friday night, Uzi asked me if I wanted to go to dinner at his friend’s house. I said “sure!” and joined Mike and Elyse at the house after I went to services at Kol Haneshama with Abi. Kol Haneshama is a Reform synagogue, but an interesting Israeli-style [read: Conservative] Reform, completely in Hebrew, with everyone wearing Kippot and the Rabbi wearing a Tallit. There was nothing, save mixed seating, to distinguish it from multiple other services in the city. The tunes were beautiful, and frankly, it reminded me of home. Anyway, dinner was at this house on Emek Refaim, owned by a dentist. The family had 7 children and great artichokes!

After that week, I headed to IC, and when I got back, it was time to return to the normal Nativ lifestyle, sans Yeshiva.

Friday, December 29 - Ross and I flew back together, and our plane landed around 10. We got our bags and went through Passport Control/Customs fine, and then found a Sherut to Jerusalem. During the ride, I sat next to Ross and some kid who was there with his girlfriend. He continually tried to perform Borat impressions, but he was beyond terrible and he would not stop. Ross and I wanted to kill him.

We arrived at Beit Nativ at 11. Joey and I ordered pizza in, I ate it, and then I went to bed.

Saturday, December 30 - I awoke at 4:30 am, ate my leftover pizza remainders, read some, and went back to sleep at 6:30 am. I again awoke around 7 at night. Shoshana, Abi, Dan, Lila, Jeff, and I went to Burgers Bar. Mmm. The guy trying to open our drinks cut himself first on the knife he was using to pop the lids off and then on the thing that holds receipts. He applied first aid and it took forever. Ugh. The Burgers Bar on Emek sucks compared to the one on BY. Abi and I found candles, and then Debbie said, “those are my candles; you can have them.” So we took the candles and organized a séance. The spirits told us to burn stuff, so we did, including a casserole we found frozen. I then did nothing for a while. I watched a movie and read, but could not fall asleep until 6 am.

Sunday, December 31 - I awoke around 1 pm. Nothing happened for a while, mainly because no one was around. For a New Year Celebration, I made Apple Cider. Really it was just hot apple juice, but it tasted great! Again, I could not sleep until 6 am. Jet Lag is the worst.

Monday, January 1 - For dinner, Shoshana and I bought gefilte fish and made soup. We put a bedsheet on the table and lit tealights for our romantic odd-cuisine dinner. Yum! That was essentially the highlight of the day, as again, I woke very late and couldn’t sleep until very late. We did, however, also watch Talladega Nights, which for some unknown reason contained extra scenes that we did not remember from the theatre. Joey, Abi, and Dan joined us.

Tuesday, January 2 - I had no choice but to awake at a normal time, because I had t’fillot, and because I was to go to Pesach’s house with the rest of the Yeshiva/Nativ people. We went there and ate and talked about our experience and how rockin’ it was. Yosef kept calling us “Nativnikim” and I thought this was ridiculous, since “Nativers” is so much easier to say. So when it got around to me, I called us “Nativlings,” which everyone loved. After that, I went back to Beit Nativ and did my laundry. During the evening, Shoshana called me and told me to come to the Café Hillel on Jaffa street to meet up with Jacob Zeliger! I did so and had a great time. How can you not have a great time when Jacob is around?

Wednesday, January 3 - In the early afternoon, I joined Shoshana and Aviva and Abbie at the AACI Book Sale. I failed to find any interesting books, since most were about motherhood. That evening, Shoshana and Rachel and I met Rachel Silverman for dinner at Village Green. She was in town on a Davidson trip, so that was nice. Anyways, eventually Phil showed up, then Amir, and then Yoav. We had a great time and then went to a waffle bar for dessert. Afterwards, Amir drove Shoshana and Phil and I to the birthright hotel to see Suzanne who was in town! Fantastic!

Thursday, January 4 - Nothing happened until the evening, when we all got onto busses to go to Tel Aviv to see Idan Raichel. Amazing concert. I got the setlist. Seriously, the concert was quite good. I did not realize before how good Idan Raichel is. Afterwards, I decided to pull an all-nighter to finally kill my jet lag. Abi stayed up with me. We watched some films, learned about parkour, and wrote some postcards. This led me, awake, into Friday.

Friday, January 5 - In the morning, I had breakfast and enjoyed it. Shoshana and I waited for Jacob to arrive for the weekend. He did so. We took him around Jerusalem and in our touring, I found Lindt truffles! I bought a box. Very yummy. Anyway, Andy also had a friend over named Ira who was quite a cool guy. At one point, five guys were in our room. There was no room. For Kabbalat Shabbat, we went to the Italian shul. I was basically dying by the point of dinner, from my all-nighter, so I went to sleep right after dinner.

Saturday, January 6 - I woke up late and realized that I had missed Shacharit and lunch. I chilled for a while with Andy and Ira (Shoshana and Jacob were missing) and then finished the book I had been reading recently. [jPod - I found it on the shelf of Beit Nativ. It’s quite good.] Shoshana and Jacob arrived after Ma’ariv, and then we decided to go to Burgers Bar. However, it was raining really badly, so instead, we ordered in. Yum! Shoshana and Lila made soup while Jacob and I ate burgers. Then we all watched Animaniacs.

Sunday, January 7 - Today began our “Israel Experience Week.” There were three groups split up into an archeology program in Jerusalem, Gadna [army training], and volunteering in Haifa. I had chosen Haifa, so we woke up early for t’fillot, then got on a bus to go to Haifa.

When we got to Haifa, we stopped at Beit Rutinberg, our home for the next week. We met Barry, who is in charge of the program. He gave us room keys, and told us that if it were more sunny, we could see an amazing view from the top of the hill. [Beit Rutinberg is in Upper Haifa.] I roomed with Daniel Goldschmidt and Joe Brophy, and then we went to eat lunch.

Lunch was great, and far better than Beit Nativ standards. We then went on a tour of the neighborhood and surroundings. We found out that we were at the top of the Bahà’i Gardens, so that was cool. We saw lots of restaurants, parks, and the zoo, where we were told some people would volunteer. We then went back to Beit Rutinberg, heard a speaker who talked about why community service is important, and then picked our volunteering jobs. I chose to work in a rec-center for old people. After that, Shoshana, Daniel, Joe, Abi, Abbie, Traci, and I went out for Chinese at a nearby restaurant. It was quite good. Afterwards, we decided to watch Clone High, the best discontinued cartoon of all time, on my computer.

Monday, January 8 - Today we began volunteering. We woke up early for t’fillot at 6:45, and then went to breakfast. Because there was La Vache Qui Rit as well as a sandwich maker, it was an excellent breakfast indeed. I also had this pudding with a chocolate mousse thing on it. Quite good. Anyway, after breakfast, a Sherut came to bring Alana, Elyse, Arielle, Joe, Daniel, and me to our volunteering place, the old people rec center. When we got there, a lady who ran the place came to talk to us to explain what the deal is. Basically, these people are self-sufficient, but they want to have a place to hang out during the days, so they come here to play games and socialize and knit and stuff. On the roof were these cardboard and string concoctions that looked like fish. I called them roof-fish, and was fascinated with them.

We then chilled with old people for a few hours. I played Rummikub with three people, but they played oddly, using the tiles to basically play a four-player game of Gin. After we finished, at 12:45, we left and went back to Beit Rutinberg for lunch. Lunch was again good. We then went with Barry for a tour of the lower city. In order to get there, we rode the Carmelit, Haifa’s subway. Because the subway traverses a mountain, it is slanted, and only goes in a straight line. It has six stops, and is quite fun. We got to the Arab/Christian Wadi in the city, and explored the area. We also visited a group called Hano’ar Halomed Veha’oved (The learning and working youth) which was a youth group for local kids. Arabs and Jews both are a part of the group, and they are harmonious.

We then went back to Beit Rutinberg, and after a little bit of free time and dinner, we discussed how our volunteering opportunities had gone. Afterwards, Daniel, Joe, Yonit, Lila, and I went to a nearby movie theatre to see “Stranger than Fiction” with Will Farrell. It was quite good.

Tuesday, January 9 - My second day of volunteering brought a game of Rummy with four old people. They were much better than the Rummikubgin crowd, and it was much harder to win. This was quite fun.

We then went back to Beit Rutinberg, and I attempted to get in touch with Nathan Kallus, who was currently in Haifa. I failed to do so. Instead, I spent some time napping and then exploring Haifa on my own. The day was very relaxed, and after dinner, I went to the mall to see what was going on there. Abi and I went into a climbing store with Daniel. Really, Abi wanted to go into the store, but we followed.

Wednesday, January 10 - I woke up feeling very very poor, and did not go to volunteering. I was sad, because I really liked the place, but I was not feeling well in the least bit. During lunch, I began to get better, but still was not up to 100%. I spent most of the afternoon napping in order to get back to health. Most people went to museums or similar things. I did not. After dinner, we watched the Israeli film, “Sof Ha’olam Smolah” (Turn left at the end of the world), which was quite good. Phil told me that there was a massive discount on Pumas at the Diesel store in the mall, so Abi and I went and bought some Pumas for 100 shekels per pair. That’s a huge deal! The shoes that I got are quite nice and retail for around 65-90 dollars in the US. I got them for 23. After getting back, we attempted to finish the Clone High season but could not succeed. We were too tired.

Thursday, January 11 - The old age home was again happy, but it was our last day, so they made an announcement and everyone thanked us. We joined them in their exercises and played various card games or dominos and then we left, but not before taking pictures of the roof-fish, so that we could make them later.

After volunteering, we headed back to Beit Rutinberg for a last session. Barry talked to us about our volunteering experiences, and we gave him gifts because he was so nice and such a helpful person. We then went back to Jerusalem and missed Haifa almost immediately. The week in Haifa was enough to remind me why Israel is special; it is a location of culture, coexistence, and excitement. It is so massively different from Jerusalem, and I can honestly say that if I were to ever live in Israel, Haifa would likely be my choice of home.

Upon returning to Beit Nativ, I met Melissa Waksman, who was in town. That was exciting. After dinner, Shoshana, Abi, Goldschmidt and I finished the Clone High season, and I went to bed.

Friday, January 12 - I woke up pretty late and called Alana so that we could go to the string store. She said that we’d go another time, but we made plans to do dinner together, since there were no meals on Beit Nativ, as vacation had officially started. I met her in her building and we began making soup, chocolate mousse, strawberries, challah, and a vegetable dish. Traci joined us, and together we had a nice dinner party once Shabbat started. We hung out for a while, and then I went to bed early, ready to wake up late again.

Saturday, January 13 - Shabbat was very peaceful; I mostly chilled around base, and when lunch rolled around, I joined Ross, Elan, Emily, and Ross’s brother Adam for a picnic in Emily’s room. I had sandwiches; everyone else did as well. After Shabbat ended, I began planning for Ireland, but mainly slept.

Sunday, January 14 - Upon waking, I felt good, but soon, I was sick. I spent much of the day vomiting and sleeping, until the late night, when I decided it was time to go to a doctor to see what was wrong. I went to Terem, a 24-hour clinic, and after hours of waiting, saw a doctor who asked for a urine sample. I was too dehydrated to pee, so I vomited instead. This did not help. He diagnosed me with Gastroentiritis, and gave me an IV and a prescription. At 2 am, once the IV finished, I felt much better and went back to Beit Nativ to go to sleep.

Monday, January 15 - When I woke up, I went to fill my prescription. I got the medicine, took it, and got to work on planning my trip with Daniel to Ireland. After 12 hours of planning, it was time to get onto a Sherut to go to the airport. We got on the sherut, slept, got to the airport, and began our vacation.

I won’t go into details about my vacation here, but I kept a separate journal for that. Perhaps I shall put it online at some point.

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 6 months ago (December 18, 2006 - 27 Kislev, 5767)

Monday, December 4 - Today, since Scott is no longer our teacher for Tanach, we had a class with Joel Levy. He’s our academic liason, but also a very bright man. The class was nice, because although we studied something from the Torah (as opposed to the Prophets or Writings), we didn’t focus only on Torah. We studied the idea of boiling down Judaism to one phrase. I prefer Hillel’s answer (”So don’t do to others what you wouldn’t want for yourself”) but the Talmud has some issues with this line, as we found out.

Anyways, nothing much else happened during the day, except later that night, I joined Shoshana, Jeff, and Cynthia at Café Hillel, as we were all in the mood to relive old times, when we would all head over there, enjoy chocolate troufs, iced hillels, etc. We did so, and it was fantastic.

Tuesday, December 5 - Normal day at the Yeshiva. Elan and I were able to catch up on the Talmud, since we had messed up last class. We excelled. Anyway, lunch was wings. They make these Honey Barbecue Sesame Wings, and they are amazing. I had like 12 pounds. Anyways, in Matt’s class, we read some stuff by Martin Buber.

After Yeshiva was Erev Nativ. We were told to put on warm clothing, because we were heading to the Old City. Upon arriving there, we sat in a circle outside of the Davidson Archaelogical Site reading some poetry about Jerusalem. Then we had to write our own poems. I wrote a haiku. Afterwards, we talked about or read our poems and then finally everyone went to the Kotel. I have to say it was among the least exciting Erevei Nativ we’ve had. And it took too long too.

Wednesday, December 6 - Wednesdays are no good. I get a lot of work done because I tend to have more free time, but they are boring. This is unimportant. What is important is that the Nativ Girls Flag Football team beat the Moms 20-0. The Moms are a bunch of Orthodox mothers, and some non-mothers (I should hope they aren’t mothers, they’re awfully young.) Anyway, Kraft Stadium began charging a five-shekel entrance fee to all guys. That’s right: no girls are charged this fee. Only males. Why? Because a few males tried to bring beer in two weeks ago, so somehow, 5 shekels will stop this behavior. I call it gender discrimination, and frankly, I don’t see what’s to stop girls from bringing beer or breaking whatever other rules the stadium has. I was disgusted with the gender discrimination and told the manager about it. He was agreeable but consistantly suggested that there was no other answer. Hillel suggested that they do the 5 shekels as a deposit to be returned at the end of the game, and the manager said they were thinking about such a thing.

Upon getting back to Beit Nativ, I began searching the internet for some word of the CJLS (Law Committee) decision. Finally, I found something, and found out, before going to bed, that Rabbi Dorff’s tshuvah passed, allowing homosexual rabbinical ordination and commitment ceremonies. Much celebration occurred.

Thursday, December 7 - Between Yeshiva and the evening, basically nothing occurred. As a matter of fact, little occurred in the evening as well. The day was boring, mainly because everything revolved around the Law Committee decision. Rabbis Roth, Rabinowitz, and two others quit the Law Committee due to the decision. This prompted much discussion, in lieu of normal Talmud study. After Talmud, I joined Matt and Mike at Burgers Bar to deflate. Then, in Pesach’s class, we discussed the halachic implications of the Law Committee decision.

What is exciting was that at 2 AM, Abi and I decided to go get pizza. We went to Big Apple, because no one else is open that late. Also because the pizza there is great! Seriously. Anyways, Abi can’t eat pizza without drinking a coke, but that’s unimportant. On the way back from pizza, we ran into Ilana and some of her friends. One of the friends was very drunk. I laughed due to this. Also, because it was dark outside (It was 2 in the morning - of course it was dark) and the stars were bright, Abi and I decided to go star-tripping. Once. Ah how I miss this summer.

Friday, December 8 - Kibbutz Day! Because we couldn’t go to Kibbutz a few weeks back, the option was opened to go this Shabbat. Only six of us took the opportunity, and one was Dan Goldschmidt, who’s not even on the Kibbutz group! This small group made for an interesting time. Yael came with us, since she lives on the Kibbutz. We took a sherut to Sa’ad, and then got to our rooms with plenty of time before Shabbat. The rooms are small. They are dirty. They are rusty. But they’ll be ok. I’ll bring lots of posters. Anyways, before Shabbat, Shoshana and Abi and Dan and I played Scrabble. I lost pretty bad. Then came Shabbat. We davened in the (beautiful) synagogue on Kibbutz, and then ate in the Chadar Ochel. The food was great! The old people who benched too slowly and sang even slower were not great.

Anyway, after dinner was more Scrabble and then the Kibbutz-group version of Apples to Apples that Andy made. Fantastic. Also, we ate some marzipan and chilled out.

Saturday, December 9 - Everyone slept late. None of the six of us went to services. After lunch, Abi and Dan and Shoshana and I walked aimlessly around the kibbutz. We admired the tire-patch, the bicycle-graveyard, and the random Texaco barrels. Abi and I decided we would make a go-kart out of one of the abandoned engines we found.

After that, Yael took us all on a real tour, and we saw the various factories, the dairy, the petting zoo, and her house. After Havdallah, we headed over to the store to get lots of popcorn. We did so. I bought 12 bags in a special “12-bag-package,” which is the best way to do it. After that, we hopped back onto the sherut to go back to J’lem. It was actually a really great weekend, mainly because it was so relaxing.

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 7 months ago (December 5, 2006 - 14 Kislev, 5767)

Monday, November 13 - Most of the day was terrible, as I was angry about having been cut out of various Winter Break plans. Here’s the story: on Wednesday, I had found out that Cynthia and a group led by Julia was going to Italy, where I wanted to go. I asked to join. However, since they already had four people, I was told that I could not join their group. Unhappy, I set about trying to figure out what I would do for Winter Break. I made a database of all the people with whom I would like to go somewhere, and began filling it in. Most people were going home, and many were staying in Israel. Some were going to Turkey, but that was off limits to me. I found another group of people going to Italy, but they were first going to Turkey, and their group was full. Finally, I had only a few people left on the database.

After Yeshiva, the weather was nasty, so Shoshana and I decided to order Chinese food in. It was quite good. While hanging out in her room, Daniel Goldschmidt showed up. He was still left on my database, so I asked him what he was planning to do for break. He said he had no plans and wanted to figure something out. So, sitting on Shoshana’s bed, the two of us decided to go to Ireland. Tickets are very cheap, and we’re gonna have an awesome time. This made my day much better.

Afterwards, Jeff and I made donuts again. We made chocolate sauce and coated the donuts. We managed to sell them for 3 shekels each in an attempt to make up the cost of the donuts themselves. We did not make back cost, but we ate a lot of the stock, so it’s all good.

Tuesday, November 14 - Normal t’fillot. The issue is that at home, in USY, at Brith Shalom, and any other minyan of which I’ve been a part, we do a simple routine which, in terms of page numbers, looks something like this: 2, 10, 12, 14, 50, 52, 54, 80, 88, 92, 94, etc. Here, however, we seem to do a routine like this: 10-20, 50-60, 80-94. That’s a ridiculous amount of extra pages that I’ve never read. And it all comes from people being pompous and having to show off what they know.

After a normal Yeshiva day was Erev Nativ, which was a discussion and presentation about the Tzahal (Israeli Army) by Nahum. I wore a beret and a belt of ammo. Nahum complained: “That’s live ammo!” I stole one bullet. It will be difficult to get it home, but I shall find a way. The program itself was nice, and not particularly boring. What I found interesting is that most Israeli teens want to be in combat units (everyone is drafted - you can choose what unit you want, usually) and don’t want to be in intelligence units. That’s not intelligent. I would love to be a spy or something.

Wednesday, November 15 - There was supposed to be a “Shiur Klali” today, but that seemed boring, and Mickey and Elan and I really wanted to check out Hebrew U, so we decided to do the latter in lieu of the former. We boarded the 9:45 bus to Hebrew U, and many people were shocked to see us. Here’s why we bused: Turns out that you have to have an ID to get into HU. We have no such ID. I asked Nahum how we could get around this, and he suggested we board the 9:45 Wednesday bus, on which there is no ID check. How happy we were!

Anyways, we got to the campus, and it began drizzling. I took pictures of all the art. The pictures are here!

After our adventure was over, we cabbed back to Beit Nativ for lunch. After lounging around for a while, I decided it was time for dinner. Shoshana and I made scrambled eggs. Yum. Also, I went to the Nativ Girls’ Football game, which was against some Yeshiva. Unfortunately, most people were at an Israel v. Croatia Soccer Game, so I was one of four fans on the Nativ side. Yael was another one, and she was crazy. It was a lot of fun going crazy, but the girls lost by a point. C’est la vie.

Thursday, November 16 - A trip to Tel Aviv was in store, brought to us by the Conservative Yeshiva. We were excited for the trip. I was so excited, I ate four puddings. This isn’t really related, but I thought it was about time to update ya’ll on my pudding consumption. Anyways, we boarded a bus and drove to Tel Aviv. We were soon joined by this guide guy. He severely needed to clean himself up - his belt was broken, his pants were scruffy, his shirt was wrinkled and poorly tucked, his shoes were dirty, and his shoelaces were frayed. Here’s what Gabe Seed has to say about him: “Our outstanding guide was Rabbi Julian Sinclair.” Allow me to briefly explain what is wrong with this phrase. (1) I would hardly call him outstanding. Twice was he upstaged by random strangers. He put Reb Shmuel (the Rosh Yeshiva) to sleep. (2) He wasn’t much of a guide either. We only saw Shai Agnon’s balcony, because he couldn’t figure out how to get us to the front of the building. (3) I’m pretty sure he wasn’t a rabbi either. He never mentioned being a rabbi. He mentioned that he’s working on his Ph.D. They probably won’t give it to him.

The tour explored the roots of Zionism. I don’t have a lot to say about it, except that at one point, Gita and I found a restaurant and shared a quiche and some ice cream. This is because the Yeshiva has the worst food ever. Seriously. It’s so bad, we got Yossi to stop letting them give it to us. We get lunch at Beit Nativ that day instead. Anyways, another memorable moment was when “Julian” was going on about some dead Zionist, and he said something that irked a passing secular Tel Avivian. The man began arguing with “Julian” and he (”Julian,” not the man) backed down immediately. Reb Shmuel, however, held his own, and jumped in the fight to protect religion, or something like that.

Oh also, we went to Independence Hall, and Lev and Elan and this guy Britt climbed up onto the stage, which is clearly forbidden. I got pictures of them, the sign, and other stuff. All of those pictures are readily available here.

After getting back, Abi was ill, so I decided we should make brownies to: a) cheer her up and b) have brownies to eat.

Friday, November 17 - I woke up very very late, which was nice, and prepared for Shabbat. I stayed in Jerusalem, but most people did not. So for most of Shabbat, I hung around with Abi. For Friday night, I went to Shira Chadasha with Andy and Matan and Aaron and Jeff, so that was cool. Afterwards, I came back, ate dinner, ate some marzipan cinnamon rolls, and went to bed early.

Saturday, November 18 - Because my human alarm clock (Jacob) was not in town, I slept in. I hit up some lunch, and afterwards, I played cards with people. We played Kuku-Taki (Abi and Koby) and Fluxx (Abi and Michael [Mee-chai-el, not Mike-el], the guy who works at the front desk). After a while, Yonit, Debbie, Alicia, and Shoshana Cohn came out with blankets, pecan pie, and cookies. They informed Abi and me that they were having a PPPP (Pecan Pie Picnic in the Park) and they asked us to join them. We did so. It was great.

After Havdallah, Abi and I joined Matt Shapiro, from Yeshiva, in our adventure to go to see the new Bond movie. Here’s the story: We cabbed over to the theatre (Rav Chen in Talpiot, my favorite by virtue of having been there more times (4) than any other theatre (0)) and attempted to buy 5 tickets. Mickey and Elan were going to join us to be persons 4 and 5. However, the lady said that the 8-o-clock show was sold out and that the 9:30 show was our best bet. We bought five tickets for that show. I called Elan - turned out he couldn’t make a show that late, so Mickey and Elan turned back. (They were walking.) We frantically tried to find someone to sell our tickets to. Luckily, Shoshana Cohn and Yonit wanted to see the movie. By the time they arrived, the 9:30 show was way sold out, so we sold them our tickets. To waste an hour and a half, we went across the street to get burgers from this burger place. The burgers were good and we ran into Phil and Angela who also had to waste an hour and a half for the same reason.

The movie was fantastic (I give it 4 albatrosses) and enjoyable.

Sunday, November 19 - Everything at Yeshiva was normal, but it was quite weird coming back to Talmud after such a long break. Elan and I got back on track pretty quickly, and all was well.

After Yeshiva, Shoshana and I decided to go check out this place called Tmol Shilshom. Earlier in the year, Jen Abrams (Nativ 25) sent me a list of places to check out, and it was at the top of the list. It’s a cute little café secluded in an area only accessible by a small alleyway. The walls are lined with books, the tables are wooden and the chairs are chairs you might find next to a fireplace in a large living room of a mansion. There was light music playing in the background, and British people nearby. The food (I had a fettucine dish) was fantastic. All in all, it was quite an enjoyable place and I recommend it highly.

Monday, November 20 - Shortly after Talmud, I decided to go downtown to look for shirts for my IA VPs. After failing at multiple locations, I came back to Yossi’s office to ask him for help. He gave me the phone number of Zev Cainan, the No'’am director, who then gave me the number of the place where they make their shirts. While David Landau helped me with that call (in Hebrew), Yossi began to leave. He asked outloud, “Who wants to babysit?” Immediately, Gita, David, and I all volunteered. We followed him out to his car, and he began driving to his home in Modi’in. After a few minutes, he realized what he had done, and began panicking - he had nothing to feed us. Jen (his wife) called him and he told her of her situation. She thought it was hilarious and suggested that “there might be pasta in the fridge.” This line was repeated many more times.

Upon arriving in Modi’in, we walked with Yossi to the school/gan where we picked up Nadav and Eitan, Yossi’s kids. We then walked to a nearby park, where there were literally tens of neighborhood kids. I’ve never seen a park so full. Nadav and Eitan played around. Eitan loves the swings, but so do lots of other kids, so we had to be fair and Eitan could only swing for a few minutes. Nadav also likes the swings, but only because he’s the older brother and Eitan loves the swings. Gita and I sensed a little competition.

After playing in the park, we all went back to Yossi’s house, where Eitan began eating pudding (which he spilled all over himself - definitely fed his shirt much more than himself.) Nadav asked Yossi what the surprise was that he said he had. Yossi said, “the surprise is the Nativers!” Nadav began crying. Yossi calmed him down and told him that he [Nadav] was gonna make cookies with the help of Gita. Unfortunately, Gita has never baked before, so David and I also joined. (How many Nativers does it take to make cookies with Nadav?) Yossi made Wacky Mac because he couldn’t find anything else to make. I suggested that “there might be pasta in the fridge” and there was. He tried to feed it to Eitan after he was still hungry after the Wacky Mac, but neither he nor Nadav was particularly interested, even though “Ima made it.”

After a while, it was time to go. David and Gita and I walked to the Modi’in bus stop for the line to Jerusalem. On the bus, we asked the driver to let us off at Yafo (where Yossi suggested we should get off) but the driver was a jerk, and after passing Yafo, he let us off in Mea Shearim.

Upon arriving at Beit Nativ, I had to get ready for the basketball tournament that Mike planned. It was supposed to be a 3×3 tournament, but Phil was ill, so that idea was scrapped. It doesn’t matter that much, however, since there are really only like 3 good basketball players among the Kibbutz guys, and two of them were on the same team. That team clearly won the tournament. I took a few pictures, but the batteries in my camera died after three, so that’s all I have. They will eventually be available in a ‘miscellaneous photos’ album with the rest of my photos.

Tuesday, November 21 - Yeshiva was normal again. I have little to say about it, except that we began studying the conflict between modern (Kantian) ethics and Judaism in Matt’s class. For Erev Nativ, this guy Mark Lazar came to lead all kinds of drama games/improv. The program was good. It started with small partner games, then games with larger groups, and finally, performances based on three things: a subject, a genre, and a fairy-tale. Our group had “Arab-Israeli Conflict, Sci-fi, Cinderella” and we put on a nice performance. The best group, however, was the “Israeli Religious Conflict, Opera, 3 Little Pigs” group.

Afterwards, Jeff and I made more donuts, which we coated with sprinkles on the chocolate frosting. We sold many.

Wednesday, November 22 - Wednesday, as with most Wednesdays, was boring. After class, I attempted to get some work done (including updating this journal) but I was not highly successful. Eventually, it was time for the Nativ girls’ football game. Although the girls lost, the game was still enjoyable. There were many more fans than last week, and the other team was ridiculous. Seriously. There was one girl on the other team who was the entire team. I called her Amber Brown, because she reminded me of those old Amber Brown books I liked to read when I was in like 3rd grade. But that’s not a good thing - if you’re playing football, you shouldn’t be wearing weird stripey sweatshirts and a flower in your hair. There was also this girl on the team who was immensely annoying. Everytime she talked, my ears hurt. At one point, Mickey tripped and really hurt her knee, and annoying girl just laughed at her. Ridiculous.

Thursday, November 23 - I was ill this morning. As a result, I missed Talmud, as I was really not doing well. However, I managed to make it to Pesach’s class (albeit a little late), the topic of which was the Death Penalty. Everyone was excited that I arrived, since I am the token DP-supporter. What I don’t understand is how someone with a brain can possibly be anti-DP. Pesach agreed with me.

Anyways, after class, it was time to prepare for Turkey Day. Upon arriving downstairs, I was surrounded by odd feelings. I was still quite ill, and my head hurt, but it was Thanksgiving, so I had to do my best to be cool. I talked to Yossi, and he told me to go inside the auditorium and get a seat early, so as to avoid the noise. Capital advice, that. Anyways, inside the auditorium, I sat next to Jeff, who was on the Thanksgiving Va’ad. He and Sarah Rader gave a few short introductions for Rabbi Lebeau, as well as Yossi, and some guy who was a friend of Mike Levin. In addition, there was a video about Mike Levin, and then it was time to go eat.

Upon entering the Chadar, we were told to pick up the letters waiting for us on the nearby table. It turns out that they got our parents to write letters and then they packaged them up as surprises. Very cool. Anyways, for dinner, there was actual carved turkey, which was fantastic. Yossi carved one of the turkeys, and we all ate happily. Oddly enough, they didn’t mash the potatoes, but did mash the yams. It was all very backwards. After that, we watched a slideshow of Nativ up until now.

Because T-day energized my spirits, I was feeling much more healthy, and Shoshana, Jeff, and Leora, and I decided to go to Max Brenner after a few hours. The four of us split four waffles. They were magnificent. Afterwards, to emulate our last MB trip, Jeff and I went to Burgers Bar to get some burgers. Jeff and Shoshana wrote each other postcards (there are free postcards at BB) and Leora and I did the same.

Friday, November 24 - Early wakeup, as we were scheduled to daven as a group before going to Kibbutz. Here’s the story: In order to visit the Kibbutz ahead of time, and since it was a closed Shabbat, we were going to go to Kibbutz this weekend. Here’s what actually happened: after leaving from Beit Nativ, we stopped at the beach in Ashdod. We played some football and other stuff, and then Yael told us all that we weren’t going to Kibbutz, because there was a Security warning nearby in S’derot. It was the type of thing, she said, that were we already at Kibbutz would be fine, but going there is a problem. At first we didn’t believe her, but it turned out she wasn’t kidding. We were indeed not going. We went back to Jerusalem.

Before Kabbalat Shabbat, Yossi (who was scheduled to spend the weekend with us anyways) talked to us about the Kibbutz and what the security alert meant. We then davened, and afterwards, played a game of Apples to Apples which was customized by Andy and Aviva and others: “Kibbutz Style Apples to Apples.” Some of the cards were quite funny, I must admit. After dinner, Yossi talked to us about our experiences so far. We discussed problems we had, and much of the conversation focused on the two major complaints: lack of time and extreme patronizing from those with a stronger religious background than the others. I brought up the second one, because I thought the t’fillot were getting out of hand. Yossi suggested the learner’s minyan. Some of the people in the patronizing group referred to the rest of us as “You” as opposed to the “We” who knew the services. Many of us found this extremely offensive as well as an excellent proof of what we were saying.

Afterwards, with the addition of Marzipan cinnamon rolls, Shoshana, Abi, Joey, and I continued the discussion on the rug in Shoshana’s room. It was very interesting how it played out, and we decided we would head to the learner’s minyan on Tuesday to see if it would help us.

Saturday, November 25 - Unfortunately, I again woke up feeling terrible (like on Thursday) and I needed to go back to sleep to push aside the feelings of fever and nausea. I woke before lunch, and ate it. It didn’t help too much, so I lounged around after the various programming we had. In reading the newspaper, I found out that there was a special preview screening of Borat (which was scheduled to come out on the 30th) that night. The excitement overwhelmed me, and I began making plans.

After Mincha/Ma’ariv/Havdallah, I called some people, and organized the trip to Borat (בוראט). In the end, six of us went to the movie: Shoshana, Abi, Mike, and two people from Yeshiva, Matt and Britt. The movie was hilarious, and I was extremely thrilled to be able to see it finally (and at a special viewing too!)

Sunday, November 26 - When I awoke, I was still not feeling well, but I went to Talmud anyways. During chevruta, I couldn’t think straight, so I went back to bed. I also was not feeling well in the afternoon, and in addition to missing lunch, I missed Kabbalah. I did, however, meet with Reb Mordechai to discuss the two days I had missed. It was not a big deal, since we are nearly done with Baba Kama. [We aren’t nearly done with the book or even the chapter, but we are nearly done with what we will accomplish before winter break.]

Joey and I had scheduled a movie-viewing for the evening, with the movie of choice being I Heart Huckabees. Unfortunately, because most Hebrew U kids have papers due in the near future, only six people showed up to the movie.

Monday, November 27 - Today was the last Tanach class with Scott. I told him that I thought perhaps the focus of the class in general was poor since we were all lumped together, regardless of our backgrounds or knowledge. Where some of us sit there bored because we can’t understand everything, others are bored due to their over-knowledge. He said that he would talk to Reb Shmuel (Rosh Yeshiva) about the issue.

After Yeshiva, we were supposed to film for the IC video, but the scene of which I was in charge at the time (the football cheerleaders) fell through, so it did not happen. [A brief explanation: I’m on the IC Video Va’ad, yet I basically had no say in the video content or plotline. In fact, the three ideas I had were quickly ignored by two overpowering members of the va’ad, while the other three members remained silent.] My second scene (Yeshiva) wasn’t set to take place until 10 PM, so Shoshana and I went out for dinner at a Latin restaurant called “La Boca.” The meat was amazing, partially because it tasted much more Mexican than you can usually find in this country.

Afterwards, it was time to film, which we did. The scenes were filmed according to the direction of Shlomo, the director, although not without taking a long time due to the insistence of other people to lead the filming. Everyone has to be in the spotlight, and in the end, no one will.

Tuesday, November 28 - Upon awakening, I headed over to the Learner’s Minyan, in an attempt to see if there was a place for me. Unfortunately, although the discussion was quite interesting, the minyan focused on very basic topics. I talked to Nahum and told him that if there were an “in-between-minyan” for those of us who know the basic service but are lost in normal t’fillot, many people would be interested.

In Talmud, it was announced that we would begin studying Chanukkah next week, starting Sunday. We realized that we had only three days of Baba Kama left, and many of us began to weep, internally at least. In Matt’s class, we read some stuff by Soloveitchik, who created the “Halakhic Man” category of person who is ethical and Jewishly observant.

After dinner was a short MASA presentation. I got another backpack and all the things inside of it. Joy. Anyways, we watched a movie with Ariel Sharon, and there were quite a few ‘coma’ jokes tossed around. Then the speaker got up there and said, “this film was taken three years ago. Obviously, Ariel Sharon can no longer talk.” That was the icing on the cake.

After the presentation came Erev Nativ, which was lead by this woman, Shoshana, who also studies at the Conservative Yeshiva. She is often chevruta with Lev or Mickey, so I already knew her. Anyways, she lead Israeli dancing. Although many people stayed in the back of the room without participating, and although I hate Israeli dancing and could have easily done the same, I did my best to participate and try the dances. I was ‘rewarded’ by rolling my ankle. I had to hop over to a chair and take a ten-minute rest break to attempt to overcome the immense pain. Matan helped me out, because his multiple ankle-injuries in the past have basically made him an expert on the topic.

Wednesday, November 29 - So today was Reb Mordechai’s first of three birthdays. Here’s the story: R. Mordechai was born in the US on December 1. When he moved to Israel, he married an Israeli, and therefore had to start celebrating his birthday on the Hebrew calendar. Since his Birth Certificate says that he was born at 7 PM, his Hebrew birthday should be the 9th of Kislev. Here’s the catch: his mom swears that he was born at 2 PM, and therefore, his birthday would be the 8th of Kislev, which fell this year on the 29th of November (today). So in Talmud, a few people organized a birthday party with cake and a card that we all signed.

After lunch, I volunteered for the first time! [We are supposed to volunteer each week, but the multiple attempts at finding a place to do so failed - first, the AACI said they needed administration work, but when I called, they said they needed no help. Then I tried to volunteer at Hebrew U in the Chem department, but received no answer. Most people have no trouble, since they have flexible schedules, but Wednesday afternoon is really my only opportunity (as it is with other Yeshiva students), so I had a tough time.] Anyways, I joined Yosef and Josh and Hillel (Shoshana also came - her volunteering snafus are another story altogether) at this nearby garden. They had come there a few times before, but I was welcomed by the various gardeners. This Australian woman Margaret was in charge, and she asked Hillel and I to remove a huge aloe tree. [Not aloe vera - She explained that this aloe was useless.] Hillel and I had to hacksaw the giant leaves off, then dig a trench around the roots and finally unroot the tree itself. It was actually quite fun.

So before the weekly football game, Cynthia and I had a date to go for dinner. We went to Cuppa Joe, because she claimed they have good Sweet Potato Soup. They do. Anyways, after our wonderful dinner and conversation, we decided to walk straight to the game instead of going back towards Beit Nativ. Unfortunately, we got lost. Very lost. We took too many wrong turns, and finally found ourselves at HaPalmach and Shai Agnon, which I was aware was far from Kraft Stadium. So Cynthia called Nahum, who told us to walk a few blocks to another corner, where he would pick us up. He did so, along with a friend who plays guitar in his band (Nahum plays drums), and brought us to the game. The girls lost again this week, but next week, they play the moms [a bunch of old, yet mean, women], so they should win.

After the game, I came back to Beit Nativ to find Shoshana and Phil in the lobby. Shoshana was trying to communicate with some deaf Frenchman and Phil was playing games on his computer. I chilled with Phil for a while, to find out that Shoshana had been helping the front desk speak to this deaf Frenchman in an attempt to find out why he would not leave, and to get him a room. Madness!

Anyways, after a while, it was time to celebrate another birthday: Hillel’s! Leora, Hillel, Shoshana, Alicia, Phil, and I (and later Jeff) went out to Café Hillel to celebrate the birthday festivities. We titled the night “Hillel at [Café] Hillel on Hillel [Street].”

Thursday, November 30 - After finishing what we were supposed to finish in Baba Kama (the last sugia…), Elan and I made Reb Mordechai a card for his second birthday. It was constructed like a sugia [Talmudic section] and finished with the conclusion that the 9th of Kislev (today) was his real birthday. He read it and said, “You guys really have a hand on the Gemara!” He then shook our hands and said, “This I will keep!” We felt proud.

In Pesach’s class, we talked about obeying the law of the land in opposition to the laws of the Torah. It was interesting.

After dinner, a large group (45 people or so) went to the Cinematheque to see a new film based on the David Grossman novel, “Mishehu Larutz Ito” (Translated as: “Someone to Run With” [sic.]). Anyways, I sat next to Abi and before the movie began, we were trying to figure out the words to Gnarles Barkley’s song, “Crazy.” We failed. Anyways, the movie was amazing. It messed with our minds. Because it was filmed on the streets of Jerusalem, without blocking the streets, Moshe’s father was in a scene, walking by happily. Ross and Elan and I freaked out.

During the movie was a scene in which they ate pizza, and Abi and I realized we were both quite hungry for pizza. On the way back from the film, the two of us began tracing some of the steps of the movie in Jerusalem, because we were still so awed. Anyways, we also decided to get pizza. It was midnight. We knew that Pizza Meter and Sababa were both closed, so we tried Pizza Panini, but it was also closed. We decided to head over to Yafo to see if Big Apple Pizza or Sbarro were open. Big Apple was! It turns out that they close at 4 AM every night. Anyways, we bought a whole pizza and enjoyed it heartily. We also decided to buy the book, “Someone to Run With” and read it, book-club style.

Friday, December 1 - I had to wake up very early to catch a bus with Shoshana to Eilat. I had planned a Shabbat in Eilat, and the earliest bus was at 7. I awoke at 6. Anyways, we went to the bus station and got on our bus. Because I had stayed up late the night before, I slept on the bus. Arriving in Eilat, we went first to the mall so that I could accomplish my one goal: get CDs. See, there’s no tax in Eilat, so CDs are ridiculously cheap. I got two CDs: the other Shotey Hanevua CD (the one I don’t have) and HaKeves Shisha-Esar (”The sixteenth sheep” - an old children’s album by Yonatan Geffen). After that, we walked through the boardwalk and enjoyed the fantastic warmth of Eilat (it’s still around 75-80 degrees there, so that’s very nice.)

Anyways, before Shabbat started, we had to get some food, so we began searching for a grocery store. We did not find one. We did, however, find a convenience store large enough to stock actual food. We bought bread and meats and mayo and bissly and wafers. Anyways, after some enjoyment of the (still warm) Eilat evening, we went to bed.

Saturday, December 2 - Upon waking, Shoshana and I decided to walk the town. We hit up the beach, from the edge of the Israeli land on the Jordanian side all the way to the port near the Egyptian side. We went North and saw several parks, including a sculpture park to which we planned to return after Shabbat for picture-taking. Actually, all the sculptures were concrete fish that had been painted, cow-parade-style.

After Shabbat, we did indeed take pictures of the fish. They can be found (with a few other pictures from the trip) here.

Anyways, after the day was over, we got on the last bus home. I tried to sleep but was unsuccessful. Overall the trip was quite fun - the weather was certainly great, and the beach was nice.

Sunday, December 3 - Ah. Talmud began a discussion of Chanukkah. Unfortunately, Elan and I were missing a page, so we thought we were supposed to start at a different point. We plowed through, but when we got to class, we found out that we were a day ahead. At least we’ll be set on Tuesday! Kabbalah was interesting, but I started to get antsy due to a lack of attention. I was tired.

Anyways, before Kabbalah, Abi and I went to three different Steimatzkys (the chain bookstore here - nothing like BN or Borders though - there’s a tiny selection in a tiny store) in an attempt to find “Someone to Run With.” We found one copy, but not a second one. Abi said she’d check for another copy at Hebrew U (the book store there, anyway). She found another copy, so our book-club adventures will begin shortly.

Anyways, after class, I came back to my room and began working on various things I needed to complete. The day overall was a little boring, but eh.

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 7 months ago (November 13, 2006 - 22 Heshvan, 5767)

Friday, October 20 - Today was another late wake-up for me. Hebrew U kids had classes, because they didn’t have class on the previous Sunday, but Yeshiva never has classes on Friday because we’re not psycho. After waking and eating lunch, I lazed around until Shabbat began. Because it was the first week of classes for Hebrew U, almost nobody made plans for the weekend, so many people stayed behind. For Kabbalat Shabbat, I joined Shoshana, Yael, Marty, Julie, Traci, and Sari at Yakar, which had a Carlebach service. It was energetic yet small and cozy. I enjoyed it immensely.

After that, we went back to base for dinner. Someone brought me soup, so I didn’t have to worry about not getting soup like last week. That was fantastic. After dinner, we played Kuku-Taki, as is normal, and had a Tisch. During the Tisch, I got a Marzipan Cinnamon Roll, though I feared they were out. They were out, but Marty had taken three and stored them, which was not nice, so he let us have them.

Saturday, October 21 - Upon waking up, it was 9:15. Late, but not too late, so I decided to walk to Yemin Moshe. At first I got lost, for about thirty minutes, but upon finally finding it, I was in time for Musaf. Admittedly, it was a little late, but at least I went. Anyways, afterwards, I joined Jacob and Gabe and Yael in the fantastic Kiddush. I will definitely be back at Yemin Moshe a lot more.

After lunch back at base, Shoshana, Jacob, Gabe, Joe, and I decided to go for Mincha, Seudah Shlishit, and Ma’ariv at Yemin Moshe. We didn’t have to leave until 4:15, though, so Shoshana and Jacob and I hung out with Jenni, Alicia, Angela, and Elana in Alicia/Angela’s room. Their room is an above-ground bomb-shelter, and it’s huge. It’s also quite fun. Anyways, after that, we left for Yemin Moshe. Mincha was great, as usual, though much smaller. On the women’s side, for example, Shoshana accompanied only one other woman, who turns out to be the wife of the Synagogue President. Seudah Shlishit was not exciting (contrary to our expectations), as it was bread, coke, and cheesecake cubes. The cubes were good, but not too filling. There was a short sicha, however, and that was good. After Ma’ariv, we had Havdalah, which was good.

Upon arriving back at base, we were all still hungry, so a bunch of us (including lots of other people) went to Cuppa Joe to eat. I had a Chocolatta, an Israeli treat which consists of Hot Frothed Milk and Chocolate Chips. The combination is amazing. I also had onion soup. It was tasty. The chocolate chips for the chocolatta came in a small cup. The small cup was very small and very cute, and I was under the influence of peers. So I stole the cup. After Cuppa Joe, some of us hit up Super-Sol to see if they sell a milk frother. They do not.

We then went back to base, where Shoshana and I joined Jenni and Molly in sign-making for their kitchen. Their kitchen was very very messy, so we made lots of signs. Some of my favorites were “‘Ask not what your kitchenette can do for you but what you can do for your kitchenette’ - John F. Kennedy” and “A messy kitchen means the terrorists win.” (Complete with a graphic picture of a burning twin towers, equated to the words ‘messy kitchen.’)

Pictures of the signs we made are available on Nathan-Miller.com, as are the rest of my photos.

Sunday, October 22 - Now that we have assigned t’fillot days, I wake up every Sunday at 8:15, which, allow me to tell you, is fantastic by me. After Talmud was a lunch of schnitzel and fries, definitely the best lunch possible. Then came Kabbalah, for the first time in like a month. Fantastic! The class was, as usual, great, although it was hard to get back into the swing after such a huge break. Anyways, after class was over, Shoshana and I made Eggs-in-a-Nest for dinner. They were quite good. I went to bed early afterwards, as I was quite tired.

Monday, October 23 - I also now wake up on Mondays at 8:15, but both of my roommates are gone by that time, so I awake to an empty room. Lev and I decided to start taking a mug of hot chocolate to our first class each day, so that was fantastic. Tanach today was the last class with this guy Haggai, whom none of us particularly like, so we were happy that the class would soon be under new leadership.

After lunch was liturgy, where we further discussed the origins of prayer. After liturgy, I walked to Ben Yehuda to buy colored pens, but Moked was closed. On the way back, my life of crime continued, as I took a brick from the huge piles of bricks between Beit Nativ and Ben Yehuda on King George.

A picture of my two stolen objects is here.

For dinner, I made myself a peanut-butter and jelly sandwich.

Tuesday, October 24 - Talmud was the same theft-related-material. [Interesting note: some sages rule that a thief can return damaged goods without covering the loss, because it encourages tshuvah, which is more important than the value of the item.]

After lunch was Matt’s class, in which we read stuff by A.D. Gordon, an early Aliyah-er who spoke about the State of Israel and Judaism’s place in the modern world.

After dinner was Erev Nativ. We talked about Israel’s meaning to us, and had a discussion afterwards about whether one can be a Zionist outside of Israel. I stated that if you are a racist, you don’t have to kill black people, and since Zionism is so often compared to racism, I further stated that if you are a Zionist, you don’t have to live in Israel. The point seemed lost on some people, who prefered to focus on my parallel between Zionism and racism, which I was obviously presenting as irony.

After Erev Nativ was a birthday party for Jacob, Emily, and Nehama. It was a costume party. I went as the “floors of Beit Nativ” and others had good costumes too! Check out my pictures here.

Wednesday, October 25 - Another basically normal day. In Talmud, we were told about the trip to Akko we would be taking the next day. We weren’t clear on the details, but it meant no classes. Anyways, after Talmud and lunch, I loafed around for a while until I decided to go look for Tortilla chips. I failed to find any. So I began decorating my room.

That night, Shoshana and I were scheduled to go on a date, but the “rain rain rain came down down down.” It rained terribly. So instead I went to bed very early [7 PM] and we put off our date until the following week.

Thursday, October 26 - I awoke at 7:30 am, meaning that I had acheived twelve-and-a-half hours of glorious sleep. Fantastic. Anyways, I checked my email to see what time we were leaving for Akko (9:15) and then went down to breakfast. Breakfast did not feature pizza toast, which was sad. Basically, for the past week, we’ve had pizza toast, which is great, and about which I wrote a song. Thursday ended the pizza toast jubilation.

And now the Akko story. At 9:15, we all (Nativers at the Conservative Yeshiva, not Hebrew U kids, plus the actual Yeshivaniks) boarded a bus. The bus driver started yelling because he thought we were simply going to the train station, but Gabe said we were going to Akko. Rabbi Lebeau had to calm the driver down and tell him that Gabe was wrong: we were only going to the train station, where we were to catch a train to Akko. Anyways, upon arriving at the station, MASA representatives began handing out blue LiveStrong-style bracelets. [MASA, an Israeli Government organization in charge of getting people to spend extended periods of time in Israel, such as on Nativ, was in charge of the Akko event.] I declined, as I do not wear bracelets. I approached an escalator where we were supposed to go, and a woman asked me where my bracelet was. I told her I did not have one, and she gave me one, saying I had to wear it to get on the train. I responded that I did not want to wear it as I don’t like bracelets, and she asked me to put it on my bag. I proceeded to do so. After I got down the escalator, this jerk who yelled at me the other week about nothing began telling me that I had to put the bracelet on. I ignored him and moved on.

[At this point I’d like to insert a note to indicate that I was never asked to show my bracelet. It was not required or even viewed at any other point in the day. I had no trouble getting on the train, which is detailed below.]

In the terminal, to which the escalator led, there was all kinds of hubbub. First of all, there was a man on stilts who fell over twice. There was loud music, and there was a man entirely painted in blue, standing perfectly still, with wheat in one hand and a flute in the other (up to his lips). After a few seconds, he drooled all over his leg, and quickly changed position. The stilted man began harassing people using cellphones, and then another stilted man showed up, along with a man dressed as a frumi and a man with a fake goat wearing a wool suit.

After a while, the train doors had still not opened. Lev and I walked around, and noticed that there was no third rail. We wondered aloud what powered the train. We eventually decided it must be powered by simple steam. There were no danger signs on the tracks, but every single column of the terminal had danger signs, since they had electrical panels. We therefore deduced that the tracks were far less dangerous than the upper platform.

Finally, after a matter of hours, we were let on the train. We Nativers wanted to sit near each other, so we walked around looking for consecutive seats while other seats filled up. Finally, the train was completely full, and we were the last seven people without seats. There were, however, seven empty cars that seemed to be closed off. We moved to the back of the train where the cars were attached and began complaining. The MASA representatives would have none of it.

We exited the train and made a run for the back of the train where a door was open. It was closed in our faces. We were unhappy. Finally, after a ridiculous conversation in which it was suggested (by a government-organization-official) that we ride on the roof, a car was opened. We got in and sat down.

The train stopped every few minutes in another town on the way to Tel Aviv. Finally, it stopped in Tel Aviv and picked up hundreds of Young Judea participants, who filled the remaining cars. After another two hours, the train arrived in Akko, and let us off.

Upon arriving at Akko, we were told we would have to take buses to the Akko central park where we would be going next. Many people got on buses, but there were clearly not enough buses to accomodate all of us. Finally, a bus came for many of us who were left, and we got to the Akko central park, which turned out to be within walking distance.

At the Akko central park, there was mass chaos. We finally made our way to the ‘backpack table’ where they were giving out backpacks. Inside the backpacks were tons of stuff, so that was nice. I soon got a call from Annie (the only staffer with us that day) who told me to meet by the gate for Mincha. I went over and all the Yeshivaniks were there. After a while, there was an announcement, but it was unintelligible. We began walking out of the park.

We walked along random roads in Akko, so I had a conversation with Mickey. At one point, half of our group split off onto a side-street. Thinking it was the correct way to go, we began to follow, but MASA people told us to continue along the main road. We did so, and soon found ourselves in the Akko shuk. It smelled of fish and was not very clean, but we walked through it nonetheless. We ended up at the port of Akko, there was hubbub, and we continued walking until we got to a random large building. It was not the fortress of Akko, which we passed, but some other form of large building. We waited on the grass for several hours until dinner (sandwiches) arrived. Soon, it was dark.

We climbed up the ramp to the building, where the MASA multimedia event began taking place. First, there was a tribute to Michael Levin, and then there was the MASA theme song, which is essentially their mission statement put to an extreme techno beat. I decided to do the same with the USCJ mission statement. Anyways, soon it was revealed that we were to experience a concert by Gaya. Gaya is an old Israeli band that I’ve seen three times in total, all at Jewish Agency events, which makes me think the Jewish Agency owns them. They are not good.

After Gaya, we boarded a bus for Yeshiva. Suddenly Rabbi Lebeau announced that some “Spanish-speakers” would be joining us, to use his words. They did so. We began driving back to Jerusalem. While on a major highway, our bus suddenly turned off. It kept coasting, but it was not running, nor were the lights or A/C on. We drifted to the side, and the bus driver started the bus up again. After about two minutes, the same thing happened. The driver stopped and called for a replacement bus.

When the replacement bus arrived, we got on and got to Jerusalem after a few hours. Overall, the day was above ridiculous.

Friday, October 27 - Upon waking up, I found out that 1/4 of our group going to Tzfat (Jeff, in particular) had dropped out due to other plans. I was not happy about this. Shoshana and Marty and I went down to breakfast and then to the bus station. We attempted to buy tickets for Tzfat, but failed to do so. Turns out you have to buy them on the bus. Not a problem. We then attempted to locate the bus. Again, failure. There is no platform 53 in the station. So we asked the information people, and they gave us vague directions which included crossing the street. After about 30 minutes of searching outside, we finally found the bus platform for Tzfat. Unfortunately, far too many others also had found it, and with only two buses remaining, the first one filled easily, and the second wasn’t scheduled for another few hours. We decided to scrap Tzfat; it was not meant to happen. [Note: it’s good that it failed - Tzfat flooded the next day.]

Instead, Shoshana and I walked around Jerusalem, attempting to find some kind of bazaar that the Jerusalem Post advertised. We failed to find it. We did, however, find a Café Hillel, where I had a Chocolatta. We then planned to go to a Hadag Nachash concert, but that fell through as it was far too expensive.

For Kabbalat Shabbat, Shoshana and Ross and I went to Chovevei Tzion, which was nice, quick, and cozy. After dinner, several of us played Apples to Apples, which I normally dislike severely. However, I came up with a new way to play: I keep my cards face down, and play the top one every time, while adding the drawn card to the bottom of my pile. I don’t find out if I’ve won until everyone else realizes they have not. I actually did quite well this way, proving that randomness is funnier than my ability to normally put together nouns and adjectives.

Then there was a tisch. It was not very good, but it did have cinnamon marzipan, which is clearly the best. In addition, many people asked Shoshana and I to do a reprise of “Oom Plucky Plucky.” [See Oct. 17]

Saturday, October 28 - Upon waking up, the weather was beyond nasty outside. It was dark and rainy and not happy. The clouds actually had visible frowny faces. So I opted to stay in, instead of travelling to Shacharit. Instead, Shoshana and Aviva and I had a breakfast party! It was fantastic - we ate cereal and talked and laughed and we were all wearing our pajamas too! After a while, we began watching people outside get destroyed by the rain. We felt sad for many of them, including Uzi, who was soaked.

After lunch, and after the weather cleared up, we tried to go to the Islamic Art Museum, which is free on Shabbat and within walking distance. Upon arriving, however, we found out that it closed at 2. The time was 2:05. Not to be dismayed, we turned the outing into a winter walk instead. After walking around talking, Shoshana and I found a bench and sat down enjoying the sight of people walking around. We made it back to Beit Nativ right before the rain came back.

After Havdallah, Daniel Goldschmidt and Shoshana and I went out to the Cinematheque to catch an animated film festival. After the long walk, we found out that the Cinematheque is closed for repairs. Turns out they moved locations, but no map had that information. We were unhappy, but we joined a large group going to Dolche, the waffle bar. I had a waffle, which was a mistake, since I should have split it with someone. Afterwards, I felt sick to my stomach, but c’est la vie.

Sunday, October 29 - Normal day. Talmud as usual, followed by lunch in the Chadar and Kabbalah. Kabbalah is getting increasingly interesting, and we discussed the “secrets” hidden in the Torah, as per the Zohar.

After Kabbalah, Shoshana went on our rescheduled date. We hit up this place called Selina. I got fish, she got chicken. Both were fantastic. In addition, we split a hot chocolate cake with passion fruit sorbet, which was amazing, and even better than at Limonim.

Monday, October 30 - Weekdays are getting increasingly more boring. Mondays especially. However, it was our first Tanach class with Scott, and although the subject matter (the Ten Commandments, for the next five weeks) was boring, the class was better than in the past, as Scott is far more dynamic than Haggai.

During lunch, I learned how to say pumpkin in hebrew: D’la’at. Unfortunately, there is no way to buy a whole d’la’at in Jerusalem, as I found out. You can get seeds or slices, but no full pumpkin. Very sad.

I wasn’t feeling too hot in the afternoon, so I didn’t go to Liturgy. Instead I took a nap. I cannot remember what I did for dinner, so I’d better stop waiting so long to update this journal.

Tuesday, October 31 - There was no Hallowe’en celebration whatsoever. Talmud included no discussion of Hallowe’en. Lunch included no discussion of Hallowe’en. In addition, lunch was dairy. We were not happy. In fact, many of us began complaining to Yossi, since he said that all lunches at Beit Nativ would be meat. He claimed it was a mistake.

Anyways, after lunch, we had a break, since Matt was on Tiyul with his high school where he teaches, so we had no class. I used this time to catch up on stuff that needed to be done. I cleaned my room significantly.

After dinner we had Erev Nativ, which consisted of watching this film, “Trembling before God,” about homosexuality in the Orthodox community. The film was interesting, and afterwards, we had discussions about the film, and we left with material about the Rabbinical Assembly decision to take place in December.

Afterwards, I had a meeting with Yossi and the other five members of the IC Video Va’ad, of which I found out I am a part. Very exciting.

Wednesday, November 1 - Talmud was normal again. We’re starting to focus on Rashi these days, though, so learning the Rashi-script was kinda crazy. After Talmud, I ate and then took a nap. I then began working on this latest update, so you can see how long it takes… I continued cleaning my room as well. I then went around town running errands, and while all the way across town, I found a grocery store that sells Tortilla chips! They are Snyder’s of Hanover White Corn Tortilla Chips in a 1-pound (”The Pounder”) bag. Not only was I thrilled to see tortilla chips, but also the words “16 oz.” I bought two bags, as well as two boxes of Cap’n Crunch, which was on sale. [It was actually so much on sale that it was cheaper than Israeli cereal normally is. Most cereal here costs around 4 dollars or so. The American cereals are around 5. Cap’n Crunch at this particular place was about 3 dollars. Fantastic!)

After that, I went by Ben Yehuda to walk around aimlessly. I found my way into one of the bazaars, where I bought two new card games, Shmonei v’hetzi (8 1/2) and Cactus. I also bought a Cinnamon chocolate bar, which is the second winter flavor of elite.

After getting back to Beit Nativ, Shoshana and I made spaghetti for dinner. We made far too much (2 kilos) but it was quite tasty! For dessert, I opened the elite bar, and found a bug. I was freaked out, but still wanted the chocolate, so I went across the street and bought another bar in place of the nasty one. We shared it, and it was quite good. Tastes like maple syrup inside of a chocolate bar.

Thursday, November 2 - The day started with Talmud as usual. After lunch was Pesach’s class, in which we discussed business ethics. The discussion focused largely on deception, and much less on the Enron-type business discussions I expected. Some of the discussion focused around a sugia in the talmud which states that it is wrong for a vendor to give away free candy to children for the sole purpose of attracting those children to buy other things.

I disagreed wholeheartedly, on the grounds that today’s society is massively different from that of 1600 years ago. My mother, for example, if she were to give me money to get something from the store, knows to expect change, and a receipt, as well as about how much each item costs. Were I to spend seven dollars on a loaf of bread, I would be scolded or not trusted to buy bread in the future. In addition, I would not be asked to run large grocery errands until I was responsible enough to do so. I concluded that in this particular case (of the free candy) it is the fault of the parent for any loss they suffer.

Sarah disagreed, on the grounds that she, in her own life, has often gone out to run errands for her parents and bought something additional for herself. I was appalled, and said that such an action was immoral, and if I were to go grocery shopping for my family, I would first ask my mom if I could get myself something. If she said no, I wouldn’t get it. I would never presume ahead of time that it was ok to essentially steal. Sarah didn’t seem to think of it as theft.

After class, I spent a lot of time napping. I also did my laundry, as is customary when one wants clean clothing. After dinner, Shoshana and Jeff [Tennessee] and I decided to go to Max Brenner. However, first, Shoshana had to attend a meeting regarding Shabbat observance on Nativ, and how to solve the lack thereof. Jeff and I waited for a while, and then decided to go to SuperSol to get some choco. However, upon arriving, we remembered that we were still fleischic and would have to wait another hour and a half before we could have dairy. So we walked around SuperSol, until we found a very nice deep pot.

We decided to buy it, because it was on sale for 60 shekels. We decided that we would make donuts in the pot, so we bought 3 liters of oil as well as many other donut materials. Upon getting back to Beit Nativ, the meeting was still going on, so we chilled out until it was done.

When it finished, we all went to Max Brenner, as we were no longer fleischic. I had chocolate and passion fruit ice cream. It was amazing. Jeff drew a picture on a newspaper that he thought was hilarious. It featured a man wearing a hat (he drew the hat) and thinking about the hat (he drew the thought bubble too.) He then took the newspaper and decided to put it on the wall.

On the way home, Jeff and I were still hungry, so we stopped at Burgers Bar and each had a 150. This brings my total Burgers Bar consumption up to 900 grams of meat. Yum! Shoshana called us gluttons, and she was right! Best Thursday ever.

Friday, November 3 - I woke up very late, and I was very lethargic. I lounged around until it was time to get ready for Shabbat. Then I did so. Because it was a closed Shabbat, we all had services at Moreshet Yisrael. Some of us decided to hit up the balcony, where we danced around in glee during the danceable songs. Many people looked at us, and by the end, many people down below danced as well.

Dinner was by group, and we were to eat on -3, as usual. Upon entering dinner, we were given numbers (I was number 2) and then told to sit in the equally numbered seat. The idea was to sit near people with whom we had yet to spend a lot of time, yet I ended up near people I knew quite well. In addition, the people who attended the previous night’s Shabbat meeting had to tell us that closed Shabbatot were now to be completely Shomer Shabbat, including inside of rooms. Many of us had little issue with this since we are already Shomer Shabbat. The people who do not fit into that category, however, whined about their personal rights.

Personally, I’m on their side. What you do in the privacy of your own room is your business, as far as I’m concerned. However, they did sign the policy manual, which says that they will be Shomer Shabbat while at Beit Nativ. Mike, however, went a little overboard in his discussion of the policy, and seemed to think that he would actually have some effect on people who don’t want to stop watching movies on Shabbat. He won’t.

After dinner, we were to go around the table and say a memory of Shabbat back home as well as a song we wanted to sing. Most people said the same boring memory of “My parents bless me!” or “We sing Eishet Chayil to my mom” (which is possibly the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. It doesn’t get more sexist than Eishet Chayil.) My memory was of Len always messing up Kiddush, every single week, and of all of us playing Rummikub after dinner. I chose to sing “Yasis Alayich Elohayich,” which is always one of my favorites.

After that, I went straight to bed as I was exhausted beyond belief.

Saturday, November 4 - Another trip to Yemin Moshe for Shacharit. I joined Jacob there, and since I arrived right before Shacharit (after Psukei D’zimra), I was asked to do Hagba. Heck yes! By the time the Torah service rolled around, I was pumped. Anyways, after all of that, there was another great Kiddush, and this time, Jacob and I got cheesecake! It was magnificent.

After Shacharit, we went back to Beit Nativ, where we were scheduled to join together for “parshat hashavua,” which included skits that we had made over the past week. My group’s skit was about the war of the nine kings in which Lot is kidnapped. Anyone who has read Sedra Scenes before might remember the part where Lot says “Help me!” and he is told “No one can hear you!” Then, a messenger comes to Avram and says “Help me! That’ll be 35 shekels.”

Anyway, we didn’t do that rendition of the story. Instead, I was Avram, and when I was told by the messenger that Lot was captured, I pulled out a large gun (my hand) and exclaimed “Aw Hell Naw!” and began shooting up the kings. During the battle, I pretended to bite Josh’s ear, who screamed “Ah, you’re biting my ear!” The play was amazing.

After that came lunch. After lunch, Shoshana, Abi, Elana, Yossi, Uzi and I busted into Shmonei v’hetzi to attempt to play it. It was fantastic. We all had a grand old time. Because Shabbat ends so early, we barely finished a few games before it was time for Mincha. After Seudah Shlishit and Ma’ariv, a lot of us boarded a bus to go to Tel Aviv for a Yitzchak Rabin memorial thing. I was interested in it, but so were a million other people, so the bus was quite crowded. Some people took a bus from the central bus station. [Too many people who didn’t sign up decided to go at the last minute, so although there was room for many of them on the bus, some had to find another option.] Anyways, upon arriving, I was unimpressed. The slogan of the year, “Shalom Achshav - Peace Now” was overused and it seemed as if Rabin was not part of the focus. In addition, everyone was smoking, which was ridiculous. Finally, Shoshana and I left and walked back toward the bus. Upon arriving at a building with nice benches, rain started to come down, Katrina-style. Seriously, trees were bent over, wind was pushing the rain into every nook of every building, and we were getting soaked.

We decided to walk toward the bus once the rain let up a little, but there was a river between us and the bus. So I had Shoshana jump on my back, and I forded the river, Oregon Trail style. I got to the bus to find that many people had come back early, due to the rain. Four people were standing outside debating as to who should get to go on the bus since there were only two spaces left. I let them continue talking while I boarded the bus with Shoshana, effectively solving their debate for them.

Upon getting back, I took a warm shower and went to bed.

Sunday, November 5 - Talmud came and went. Due to the upcoming Gay Pride Parade and various military operations in Gaza, the Jewish Agency received word of violence that was to take place in J’lem, so we were on temporary lockdown after Talmud. I was still able to go across the street to do some grocery shopping, however, so that was not so much of an issue.

Kabbalah was fun. Mickey is a fun chevruta, and we discussed the “great story” of the Zohar. For dinner, we ate leftover spaghetti, from the bottomless pot we made. The girls had a “girls’ night” which included fondue and “When Harry Met Sally.” Since I like this movie and I like fondue, I was unhappy that I was not invited. Of course, I’m male, but we don’t have boys’ nights, so this added insult to injury. I decided to make an event of my own.

I made a flyer for a viewing of “Thank you for Smoking” to be held next week. The flyer was awesome, and I have included a copy of it here.

Monday, November 6 - After Tanach, in which we continued study of the 10 commandments, I took pictures of my room so that everyone can see how awesome my abode is. These pictures are available here. Rabbi Goldfarb was absent, so that took care of Liturgy for the day.

For dinner, Shoshana and Jeff and I made pancakes with chocolate spread and hot apple juice with cinnamon sticks. After we consumed our pancakes, Jeff and I got our donut materials and began making our first donuts: Cinnamon Nutmeg donuts. Unfortunately, they looked like aliens. Fortunately, they tasted like AWESOME aliens. We put our donuts away, and allowed our (hot) oil to cool.

After a few hours, Abi helped clean up, and Abi, Jeff, and I attempted to transfer the oil to a plastic bottle. Unfortunately, it was still quite hot, and it melted through our makeshift funnel (a bowl in which we poked a hole - the oil made it into a plate) as well as through the bottle. Hot oil was everywhere.

We made a sign that said something about the extremely hot oil, and moved the pot to our pantry (above Shoshana’s bed) and left it overnight. I took pictures of the donut-mania. They are here.

Tuesday, November 7 - Normal day at Yeshiva. That much is unexciting. Erev Nativ was much more exciting, so I will skip right to that. For Erev Nativ, we were split into groups for a pot-luck meal. I was on the main-course group. We received 150 shekels and decided to make a tuna casserole. It included noodles, cheese, tuna, and general yumminess.

During the cooking process, Mike dropped a glass plate, which shattered everywhere. Soon after, Shoshana dropped a ceramic bowl. Mike and David said that it was the “night of broken glass” (Kristallnacht.) Although I found this to be hilarious, one person did not, and told Mike so. He felt sheepish, which was interesting, since it really just meant that someone had no sense of humor. Anyways, other dishes served that night included stir-fried veggies (which were ok, but not plentiful), tabouleh, salad, and brownies! One batch of brownies was called “Adventure Brownies,” since, as Tani explained, the insides were raw and the outsides were burnt. The ABs turned out to be the best brownies though. They were quite tasty indeed.

After all that, Aviva dropped yet another bowl, full of noodles, and it also shattered. Kristallnacht indeed.

Wednesday, November 8 - Normal morning of Talmud, except that everyone [foreigners excluded] in class seemed overly pleased and self-smug. Here is why. In the morning, the paper carried a story about how the Democrats had gained control in the House. A lot of people said things such as “We won!” and “We took the House!” etc. Here is my complaint: I hate it when people refer to political parties as “we” as if they are somehow involved in the Top Brass of the party. This isn’t a sports team, in which you may have purchased tickets to see games, or something. The only impact you had on the election was one vote, which, although it is important, does not qualify you as part of the winning party. In addition, the Democrats are just as likely to disenfranchise you as the Republicans are, just on different issues. That’s the beauty of a two-party system: the American public is screwed no matter what the outcome.

After Talmud, I joined Shoshana in walking to Ben Yehuda to check out a thrift store she had heard about. Unfortunately, it was closed.

Upon getting back to Beit Nativ, Daniel Goldstein called to let me know that he had found paint. Excellent. I went up to his room and began painting my stomach with a huge ‘N.’ See, the second game of the Nativ Girls’ Flag Football team was that night, and the game was against Young Judea. Therefore, not only is this the most important game of the season, but it was a time for some of us to show off how crazy of fans we are. Daniel Peaceman took the ‘A,’ Ross had ‘T,’ Jeremy had ‘I,’ Lev had ‘V,’ and Dan Goldstein finished us off with an exclamation point.

Upon getting to the game (fully dressed), we took off our pants and shirts, so that we were wearing only bathing suits and bandanas on our heads. It was freezing. We were awesome. The game was also quite fantastic: at half time, we were up 19-12. After a few touchdowns, the game was almost over. There were 4 seconds on the clock. We had possession, and the score was 25-24. We only had to run the clock down to win. Unfortunately, it was fourth down, and somehow, the last play took only 3 seconds. 1 second left on the clock, a turnover to the YJ team. A fantastic play by our defensive line ended the game, and we all charged the field like lunatics.

My favorite part of the night was when the six of us ran back and forth to always be near the current play. While passing YJ kids, (many of whom are British), some of the British girls would yell different things at us. My favorite line was, “Nobody wants to see that! Put some bloody clothes on!”

Afterwards, Shoshana and I ordered pizza. Pictures from the football game are available here.

Thursday, November 9 - More Talmud madness. During class, Rabbi Mordechai said quite a few funny things, and afterwards, he said “I am hot!” which really wrapped up the whole class. Pesach’s class centered on medical ethics. I said that it is no longer a matter of ethics whether you tell a patient his diagnosis and prognosis, but rather, just good business practices. Simply put, no doctor would stay in business if he kept massive amounts of information from patients, simply since we are more conscious these days than one or two hundred years ago.

After dinner finished, Jeff and I decided to make more donuts. We got more ingredients and then began making “sugar donuts.” We bought a bottle of grape juice to use as a rolling pin, and we rolled the dough out. This helped greatly, as did cutting circles, since the donuts turned out perfectly round and perfectly beautiful. In addition, they tasted fantastic. We decided to make donuts twice a week, and we are improving rapidly.

Friday, November 10 - Upon waking, Shoshana and I took a cab to the central bus station, in order to get to Ariel for the weekend, to visit Yoav. We got on the bus and told the driver we wanted to get off at Tzionut street in Ariel. He seemed to understand. After a long ride which stopped in every settlement/town along the way (Ofra, Eli, and Shilo, the first capital of Biblical Israel) we arrived in Ariel. The driver said something about Tzionut, and the next thing we knew, we missed our stop. He circled back around and we got off.

Yoav showed up and took us to his house, where we met his family. We then walked around Ariel with Star, who is Yoav’s dog. While walking, Star ate a turtle.

We came back and got ready for Shabbat. The synagogue in Ariel where Yoav davens is nice, although a little boring. During the d’var torah, everyone fell asleep except for me. This is amusing only because since the d’var was entirely in Hebrew, I had no idea what was being discussed. In addition, this is basically the only time during the Shabbat that I was awake, except for meals.

For dinner, we had gefilte fish, boreikas, potato salad, chicken soup, chicken, potatoes, couscous, and schnitzel. It was all quite yummy. After dinner, Yoav took us (along with Itzik, his older brother) to the house of some of their friends. They spoke English, so I was not in the dark. The conversation was ridiculous, but fun. After that, we went back and went to bed.

Saturday, November 11 - Happy Armistice Day. There’s another holiday no one in Israel celebrates. WWI and all. Anyways, I woke up at 8 to go to synagogue, but I was far too tired, so I stayed behind and continued sleeping. I did not reawake until right before lunch. Lunch was the same as dinner, and was still quite delectable. After lunch, Shoshana and Yoav and I played Kuku-taki. After a few games, everyone went to take naps. I was happy about this.

I slept until Havdallah, which Yoav tried to do camp-style, but quickly gave up, since only the four of us (3+Itzik, who was a Rosh Edah a few years back) knew the tune. After that, we tried to get back to Jerusalem, but this proved futile. Shoshana and I had paid 10 shekels each for (heavily discounted) tickets to a Carlebach concert set to take place at 9 in J’lem, thinking we’d be able to make it back in time. However, we soon found out that the first bus from Ariel leaves at 9, so we gave up on the concert. We had pizza in Ariel with Yoav, and at 9, we left for Jerusalem. The Shabbat was great, and it was fantastic to see Yoav again!

Sunday, November 12 - A normal day at Yeshiva brought no surprises. Mickey and I made a bunch of jokes while in Chevruta for Kabbalah, but everything else was normal. For dinner, Shoshana and I cooked omelettes. Actually, she cooked them. I ate. They were fantastic! They included spinach and peas, and they were so tasty!

Anyways, it was time soon after for the viewing of “Thank you for Smoking.” I didn’t know how many people to expect, as I had put the flyers up everywhere but heard little-to-no feedback. However, the lack of feedback was because I asked for none, and because my name was not on the flyers.

Anyways, when 8:27 hit, there were over 20 people downstairs. We started the movie, and by 9, there were 40 people watching. I was thrilled! My program had been a success, so I decided to do it more often. Every two weeks, I’m going to put together a movie viewing!

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 8 months ago (October 20, 2006 - 28 Tishrei, 5767)

Looks like I’ve gotten a little behind. I’ll try to catch up with as much detail as possible, and hopefully this won’t happen again.

Tuesday, October 3 - Today was a normal day for us in the Yeshiva, though Hebrew U kids had final exams. Many Yeshivaniks laughed heartily. Speaking of laughing heartily, our Talmud teacher made four amusing jokes, as he is a witty guy. At one point, this guy Jason said: “Have you heard the joke about the rabbi who retired at age 80?” Rabbi Mordechai responded: “No! And I want to finish this sugiah [Section of Talmud].” We decided that that was the best punchline for any joke. After Talmud, many of us decided to watch Kill Bill: vol 1. After it finished, we made it on time to Matt’s class with 30 seconds to spare. Matt’s class was interesting, as usual, and we studied Mordechai Kaplan, the founder of Reconstructionist Judaism. After class and dinner, I chilled out around Beit Nativ until deciding to go to bed. Hebrew U kids, too busy studying for exams, were not fun.

Wednesday, October 4 - Talmud again today, as usual. The class was shortened, however, as there were little “sukkot-stations” planned after class. I was not feeling well during the class, and frankly, I was not feeling well at all the whole day. I woke up feeling depressed. So after Talmud, I went back to my room and slept, missing the stations. No loss. I woke up too late to get Pizza for lunch, however, so I snacked on pretzels in Debbie’s room. After snacking, I went back to bed, hoping to assuage my unhappiness. I woke in time for dinner. Because she was here for a talk on Conservative Judaism, Dean Shuly Schwartz organized a table of List College people. Afterwards, she led her talk, which was long, and allowed me to come up with a real idea on the problem of our movement. It is not a problem in ideology or any decisions that the CJLS makes. These affect the membership on only a minute scale. Instead, the real problems concern synagogues and changes on the microcosmic level. Our synagogue membership, for example, dropped due to issues with our former Rabbi, and as a Modern Orthodox minyan started in Meyerland, not due to decisions of USCJ or the Rabbinical Assembly. Anyways, after that, I called my mom, who suggested chocolate to make me happy again. I went to Café Hillel with Cynthia, Leora, and this guy from YJ year-course who was at Beit Nativ for the List-dinner. It helped greatly.

Thursday, October 5 - No Yeshiva today. Instead, we had Nativ-based Sukkot sessions, led by Yeshivaniks. However, since only 4 Yeshivaniks were needed from each group, I did not lead a session. The first session was led by Josh and Jacob. It concerned building a Sukkah, the halacha behind it, and finally ended with us building our own sukkot out of popsicle sticks. Sarah and Gabe led the second session, which concerned Lulav and Etrog purchasing.

After that brouhaha, we broke into two groups: GBtS and GDtS. [Group Build the Sukkah, and Group Decorate the Sukkah.] Naturally, I joined the decorating committee, as I had paper-chain experience and (finally) an outlet in which to display it! Abi and I made a huge paper-chain with 154 links. It stretched all throughout the Sukkah, and we were proud. We then did research and found that the largest paper-chain in history was 54 miles long. We plan to beat this.

After lunch, we then took a trip to the Shuk to purchase the four species. Moshe met Elan and me there, and aided us in the purchasing. I ended up with a very nice etrog, and a sephardic-style lulav (closed top). Afterwards, we hit up Marzipan, where I bought a cinnamon roll. ALERT: This is extremely important: Cinnamon rolls from Marzipan are far better than the rugelach. I know this sounds like blasphemy, but it is not! The cinnamon rolls are AMAZING.

Anyways, after all that, Jeff, Shoshana, Leora, and I all went to Soya to try it out. Many people have raved about the goodness of this Chinese food, but we had yet to experience it. Allow me to say firsthand that it is amazing, and well-priced. I also got a chance to try Spring Pomegranate Juice. Fantastic. Upon arriving back to Agron St, we stopped at SuperSol, where I bought 3 liters of the stuff. Yum! While at SuperSol, many people were causing ruckus. Turns out that they were Americans, here for Sukkot, with a party starting at their hotel in 5 minutes, and they were just now purchasing food. I discovered a dislike for these foreigners, and felt like an insider. The russians were even worse, as they were holding up the lines with non-working credit-cards.

Friday, October 6 - After a long sleep-in, I went around base preparing for Shabbat and Sukkot. Even though I wouldn’t need it for Shabbat, I put my lulav together and admired it immensely. I then went to Cynthia’s room and chilled out for a while with her and Sam.

Because many of us could not decide upon a synagogue for Sukkot services, we decided to make our own minyan in Yemin Moshe. It was quite nice, as there were nearly twenty of us there. Hillel led, and did a good job as well. In addition, there was a visitor, a guy named Zach, from YJ Year Course. After the service, we went back to Beit Nativ and ate dinner. During the meal, Zach made a comment that he did not feel comfortable with the Shabbat elevator, and that began an argument between him and Andy. I thought it was interesting that he didn’t feel comfortable riding in a Shabbat-friendly elevator, yet he had no qualms about (essentially) stealing form the youth hostel by eating a meal without paying for it. After dinner, there was a tisch in the small Sukkah. I showed up, but left soon after, due to extreme boredom.

Saturday, October 7 - I spent most of the day in Cynthia’s room, either hanging out with her or Sam, or napping in Marlee’s bed. I remember almost nothing else about the day, due to the intense amount of sleeping and non-active activities. To end the day after Havdallah, I packed for the upcoming Tiyul and then went to bed early to prepare for an early wakeup.

Sunday, October 8 - We woke up at 6:30 today, so that we could have t’fillot at 6:45 in order to leave early for the Tiyul. T’fillot were fun, as we got to shake our various lulavs and etrogs in honor of Sukkot. After breakfast in the Sukkah, we boarded a bus headed for Mitzpe Ramon. Because the ride was long and it was early, we all slept, though we were awake long enough to notice a sign on the front of the bus that read:

Seat belts,
till the end of your trip,
are required on this bus!

Among others, Joey and I continually made fun of this sign, reading it in different voices, etc. Anyways, upon arriving at Mitzpe Ramon, we met Yonatan, our guide for our three-day tiyul. We began hiking at ancient ruins of a house used by an ancient people whose names I have forgotten. They were traders, and they had camels. This much I remember. Mike claimed that he built the ruins. We also saw several-thousand-year-old graves of these people.

Anyways, the walking was easy and mostly flat. We stopped at one point to find a rock that meant something to us. I picked up a very nice red rock, the same color red as some of the bricks in front of my house. We then sat in a circle with our eyes closed and had to pass the rocks around, attempting to find ours by touch alone. Marty dropped mine, so I never got to feel it again. But since it was red, it was easily found.

Soon, we arrived at the place we would be sleeping for the night. Some people set up tents, but most of the guys and Shoshana and Abi decided to sleep outside. I was one of those people. Dinner was fantastic, and so was the Kumzitz. However, Andy wanted to play mafia, as did many of us, so we started doing so, when suddenly, Mike cut in with guitar. Andy was angry, but it turned out Mike didn’t realize what was going on.

Before bed, many of us (guys only, it seemed) told our various versions of the Aristocrats.

Monday, October 9 - Wake up was at 4:45. This is too early to wake up. It was still dark, obviously. My brain was not ready to turn on. It only became light for Shacharit, which was long. We ate cereals and drank hot drinks before leaving. I had an Israeli version of Cookie Crisp. Wow! It was fantastic.

Anyways, we grabbed lunch supplies and packed them in our bags, in addition to the 4.5 liters of water we were required to carry for the day. We then set out, leaving the machtesh. A machtesh is a geographical formation unlike any other. It is often called a crater, but it was caused by erosion, not impact. There are only seven machteshes in the world. Three large ones are in Israel, as are two tiny ones. The other two, which are very small, are in the Sinai peninsula.

Anyways, we spent most of the morning climbing up the side of the Machtesh. The hike was much harder than the previous day, but everyone seemed to be ok. I spent most of the time talking with Abi, in a Talmud-tangent-filled-style discussion, starting with Aaron Sorkin [creator of “The American President”] and moving to every topic under the sun.

Upon reaching the top of the machtesh, we began eating a real breakfast. By “real,” I mean that it consisted of more than cereal. In reality, I had a chocolate-and-cheese-sandwich. Anyways, after that, we walked down the other side, into the wadi below. After a lot of downhill climbing, we stopped under a tree to eat lunch. We took a mighty long break, which I did not think was necessary, but I soon realized that we were travelling at a too-fast pace, and we would arrive at the next campsite too early if we did not slow down.

After seven hours of hiking, we arrived at the next campsite and began setting up for another night under the stars. After dinner, which was again fantastic, we walked out into the desert for an activity. The activity was spreading out and sitting in the desert, with the idea being that we would think about the desert, etc. I have done this activity twice before. I fell asleep. Actually, because we had been up for many strenuous hours, we all fell asleep. When it was time to go in, we were missing three people.

After finding the last three people, we all went to bed very quickly.

Tuesday, October 10 - We woke up much later this morning, at 5:30. Woo. Anyways, after more shacharit and cookie crisp, we got ready to leave for the day’s hiking. Most of the hiking was uphill and much harder than the day before. We moved at a slow pace, in order to keep the group together, and all of us conquered the mountain as one group, which was quite a sight to see. Abi and I continued our uncompleted conversation.

Upon finally reaching the top, we stopped and had breakfast. We also played a game where we wrote, on a slip of paper, one thing we’d want with us in the desert. We then mixed them up and had to guess who wrote what. While chilling out, Abi and I found a rock with a phone number chalked onto it. We wrote down the phone number with the intention of later calling it. We should have taken a picture, though, because we later lost the number.

The rest of the hike was downhill, and after lunch, half the group boarded jeeps to go to the end. I stayed in the “keep walking” group, which was slowly diminishing as more jeeps showed up. I boarded the last jeep, and on the ride back to our bus, (which was only about 2 more kilometers away - we accomplished over 30 kilometers over the two and a half days) Abi and I finished our conversation.

Afterwards, we all boarded our bus and headed toward the Massada Youth Hostel for dinner. We stopped on the way at a gas-station, where I picked up a carton of Yotvata Milk Shake (similar to Yotvata Choco, the best drink of all time. Scratch that, the second best drink of all time. The milk shake is amazing.)

Anyways, after dinner at Massada, we went back to Beit Nativ, where we caught up on our sleep from three days prior. All in all, I had a fantastic time on the tiyul, and I can’t wait to go hiking again. Pictures that I took are all available at http://nathan-miller.com/photos/nativ/tiyul/tiyul.html.

Wednesday, October 11 - Today was a free day, and most of us spent it deflating from the tiyul. My neck was badly burned, so I headed to SuperPharm to get some Aloe, which was a more daunting task than one might expect. While I was in the area, I hit up a computer store called “Bug” to get a flash-drive. Exciting.

I came back to Beit Nativ, and Aaron and Abi and Julie and I all watched some episodes of this new show called Studio 60. The reason I was interested is that the show is the new Aaron Sorkin creation, and after a three-day conversation beginning and ending with that exact person, how could I resist? The show was quite good, so that was enjoyable.

After a while came dinner, and finally, bedtime for me. I was thoroughly exhausted, even after lazing around the entire day. Eh.

Thursday, October 12 - Today meant the Masorti big event. Masorti (Conservative) Jews from all over the globe (North America, England, South America) met at the biblical ranch place near Modi’in. The name of the place is Ne’ot Kedumim. I had been there before, with Etgar, to herd sheep. It’s not so exciting. Anyways, we split up into groups, did a leadership activity, cooked lunch, and did two more leadership things, including Archery. My sub-group won the archery competition. I took lots of pictures with Jeff’s camera, but I have yet to retreive them from him. When I do, they will be available online.

After the various activities, we had dinner and what seemed to be some sort of dance. I was uninterested in watching various South Americans sing Shakira songs, so I chilled out with those who were not dancing. After the day’s events were over, I headed over to Burgers Bar to get a burger. Man those are good burgers.

Friday, October 13 - Josh’s mom was in town, so she took us out to breakfast. “Us” consists of Josh, Shoshana, Phil, Gabe, Hanna, Ross, Sarah, and me. We went to Tal Bagels on Emek, always yummy. In addition to a bagel and salad, I got a “Mekupelet shake,” which is exactly as it sounds: a milk-shake made with mekupelet bars. Beyond amazing.

After that, we went back to Beit Nativ. The plan was for us to go to the Israel Museum, but once we realized that we’d have only a few hours, we decided to ditch that plan. We shall go another time. We prepared for Simchat Torah, then began “shul-hopping.” We started off at Shira Chadasha, which was lively, exciting, and beautiful. After the first hakafa, we left for Kedem, which we found out was closed. We then tried to go to Kol Haneshama, but got lost, and found a synagogue called Ya’el instead. We also hit up a nearby Sephardic minyan. After that, we headed towards two more synagogues, Pelech and Nitzanim, both of which were finished by the time we got there. We then found Kol Haneshama, but it too was closed. I didn’t enjoy the ‘hopping’ aspect of it, and I would have been much happier simply staying at Shira Chadasha. Eh.

We went back to Beit Nativ for dinner. I failed to get soup, and among other terrible things, this caused me immense anger. I left. Joe came and cheered me up, so that was good.

Saturday, October 14 - Upon waking up, I joined Elan and Jacob in going to the Ashkenazic Yemin Moshe Minyan. It was the first time I’ve been there, so that was nice. Although we didn’t have seats for the beginning, after the Hakafot, we went to the sukkah, where 1/3 of the Torah reading was occurring. The way they set it up was to have three different Torah-reading/Kiddush stations. The kiddush, as everyone in the past has stated, was amazing. I shall be back there soon enough. Elan and I joked around with people who seemed to show up just for the kiddush, though a few stayed for Musaf. All in all, it was a great service.

Lunch was scheduled for 1:30, since services always run very late on Simchat Torah. We got back just in time. After lunch, many of us played Fluxx in the courtyard, until Mincha at 4:15. I missed Mincha due to an extreme need to go to the restroom. When I got back, I was about to join the minyan when I suddenly noticed that everyone was facing the only entrance available to me. So I waited inside the sukkah, not wanting to be embarrassed.

After Seudah Shlishit, there was Ma’ariv and Havdalah. After that, we went to Gan Ha’atzmaut for what is called Hakafot Shniot, or Second Hakafot. There was dancing and singing, but I was not in the mood to do so, as it was very freezing and I had forgotten a sweatshirt. Instead, I got a burger from the Burgers Bar outlet there, and I gave blood in a Magen David Adom Yellow Blood Donation Van. Yael helped me, since I could not understand the form, which was entirely in Hebrew.

Sunday, October 15 - I spent most of the morning doing a lot of nothing. I did laundry, so that was useful, but other than that, I spent the day doing nothing. After lunch, there was more orientation, now that the semester is starting for the Hebrew U kids. It was nothing special, but it seemed to take a long time to get through. The Hebrew U kids had to do stuff with their schedules, and we all had to sign up for which mornings we would attend t’fillot. I chose Tuesday and Wednesday, simply because they fit into my schedule. The day went by quite quickly.

Monday, October 16 - Class started again today. Tanach was first, and as usual, was not exciting. Lev and I read what we needed to read, but increasingly, I am getting nothing out of this class. Anyways, after that, Lev and I bought another chicken from Super-Sol, so that was fantastic. Then came Liturgy, in which we discussed the origins of prayer.

After classes were done, Shoshana and I went to Jaffa street in an attempt to find warm shoes. We failed. While there, we looked for pots and pans, but also failed in that venture. So we went back to Beit Nativ and had peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Yum!

Tuesday, October 17 - Talmud was interesting, as we are now working on Baba Kama. We started with the Mishna, which is all about what to do when people steal stuff. After Talmud was lunch, which featured schnitzel, which I love, so I ate three schnitzels. Yum! Afterwards, I went to Home Center with Leora and Daniel, in an attempt to get pots. I failed yet again.

Then came Matt’s Class, in which we read stuff by Ahad Ha’am, who wrote in the late 19th century in response to many of Herzl’s writings. He defined Judaism as a culture/civilization, in which the religion fits in to the middle. He claimed that one can be Jewish and not-religious, but cannot be religiously Jewish and not part of the Jewish nation.

After class and dinner was Erev Nativ. Andy and Aviva planned an awesome talent show for the group, and it was a lot of fun. Shoshana and I performed “Oom Plucky Plucky,” the amazing song/skit written by one of our (10-year-old) campers this summer. Needless to say, it was the highlight of the show. Andy was also quite a highlight, as he (as one of the MCs) came in between every act, dressed differently, Groucho style. The whole evening was tons of fun.

Wednesday, October 18 - Talmud continued with the Mishna again. Elan and I made much more progress than on Tuesday (we were quite slow on Tuesday) and we understood much more. That was good. After Talmud, I went across town to run some errands, then came back and ate another peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I spent some time alone, watching Arrested Development on DVD, and waited for the Hebrew U kids to come back from classes. For dinner, Jeff and Shoshana and I ordered Soya delivery. I got stir-fried noodles with chicken and vegetables, doused in very spicy Szechuan sauce.

Thursday, October 19 - Again with the mishna! I read in class, and compared a particular case of thievery in the mishna to a drug-addict who steals from his mother’s purse. The comparison was fabulous, and enabled many to understand the mishna easily. Others, however, led by Sarah, found my comparison to be rude, and said so. Actually, she was the only “other,” and responded to what she thought was rudeness quite rudely. Anyways, after Talmud, I had lunch, followed by Pesach’s class. We talked about Lashon Hara online, and the ramifications of online social-networking.

Afterwards, Mickey, Elan, and I all watched Dr. Strangelove in the Moadon. Once the Hebrew U kids came back, we all had dinner, after which the girls had a session led by the Rape Crisis Hotline people. After that finished, Shoshana, Abi, and I watched Arrested Development. There was a general feeling of sluggishness throughout the day.

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 9 months ago (October 3, 2006 - 11 Tishrei, 5767)

Wednesday, September 27 - So today was a short day, as are all Wednesdays. After Talmud, I hung out with Cynthia and her roommates, Sam and Marlee, because they had no class and stayed at Beit Nativ. That was fun, although I ended up defrosting their freezer and throwing rotten fruit out of the window onto the amphitheatre.

After that, we all (everyone who was at Beit Nativ and not at Hebrew U) got on a bus to go to an AACI (Association of Americans and Canadians in Israel) memorial service. The ceremony was a little odd, mostly because we didn’t really know what was going on until we got there. There was an accordianist though, so that’s always a plus. Unfortunately, he was terrible. That was a minus.

After that, we headed to Har El mall, where I got Pizza Hut. Then Moshe picked up all of the former Swusyites and Emtzaniks so that we could have a barbecue/get-together at his house. We did so. I ate many wings (yum) and we talked about various things; there were fifteen of us pleasant, so it was crazy.

Moshe asked us to make two movies to promote Nativ in our regions. Look forward to a moving coming soon featuring Debbie, Arielle, and me!

After all that hubbub, we went back to Beit Nativ, where I was informed that Nathan Sunshine, a member of our group, was leaving Nativ. Basically, he was not suited for the program and had a hard time with interpersonal relationships (specifically between himself and Yossi Garr, the director of Nativ.)

Thursday, September 28 - As usual, the day started with Tanach. After it was done, I went to Nahum’s office with my “detergent” to figure out how much to put in the laundry. (The cap was very very small, so it was not obvious.) He looked at the bottle and said, “this is not detergent.” I was furious. I had made every effort to not end up with fabric softener, which is a common mistake. (They sell it in like 10 liter bottles… Israelis love soft clothing.) However, instead of ending up with fabric softener, I had purchased Stain Remover. Fantastic. Needless to say, I was less than pleased. I said, “But it says ‘economica!’ I wanted an economic bottle and the woman said it was detergent!” Nahum explained that ‘economica’ is actually ‘bleach’ in Hebrew. I was shouting about it when Jesse (a staffer) walked in and looked at the bottle. He said “That’s not detergent.” I agreed. He continued, “Oh, Kalia! [The name of the stuff.] I remember the commercial for this! The woman is pouring it on the clothes and the man runs in, ‘Lo, Lo! Ze economica!’ [’No, No! It’s bleach!’] The woman responds to this, ‘Lo, ze lo economica; ze Kalia!’ [’No, it’s not bleach; it’s Kalia!’]”

Apparently that was hilarious. Anyways, at this point, I realized I did not have enough time to get new detergent and make it to Pesach’s class, so I chose class. Unfortunately, I had to bring my Kalia and my Yeshiav-supplied-salad into class. He didn’t mind. We discussed intermarriage in the class.

Afterwards, Hillel and I went to Mister Zol on Ben Yehuda to return our Kalia. We then hit up SuperPharm on HaHistadrut (off of Ben Yehuda) on suggestion by Nahum and found real detergent. “Persil Gel” is green and detergenty.

I then did my laundry. After that, I relaxed until the Hebrew U kids arrived back at Beit Nativ. After dinner, Shoshana, Lila, Aaron S, Daniel G, and Phil and I all went out to Aroma for some nice iced coffee. We chilled out and enjoyed the area. We then went to SuperPharm and walked around making noise in our awe of the wide variety of products that a simple pharmacy contains.

Afterwards, I hung out with Shoshana, Joe, Abi and Aviva while Joe tried to teach Shoshana how to play “Free Falling” (possibly the worst song ever written) on the guitar.

Friday, September 29 - First late wake up ever! Normally, Hebrew U kids who don’t have a morning class (half of them every day, it seems) go to the 9:15 shacharit, while the other kids and us Yeshivaniks go to the 7:30 service. Not fun. Today however, we had no classes (we never do on Friday), but Hebrew U kids did! So we got to go to the 9:15 service. After that, I spent time relaxing and preparing for Shabbat.

Finally, it was time to leave for Shabbat. Ross, Emily, Elan, and I were all going to Moshe’s house for Shabbat, so we went across the street waiting for the cab that he called for us. We did not find it. Moshe called us multiple times, and finally, a cab pulled over for us. We assumed it was the right one (there’s no way to tell, all Israeli cabs say “Monit.” Turns out that this guy was actually not the right cab, and he charged us 10 more shekels than Moshe said the other guy would, since he booked the other guy. Oh well.

We got to Moshe’s and got ready for Shabbat. After Kabbalat Shabbat we came back to the house for a great dinner. As I already knew, Moshe’s mom is a fantastic cook, and the table was laden with yumminess. I stated, in my limited Hebrew knowledge, “ze ofe metsuyan” - “this chicken is amazing.” Emily and Ross laughed at me because my only sentences are three words.

Elan and I used talmudic terms during dinner, because we could. (Also because we’ve built some into our vocabulary, such as “ka mashma lan,” which is essentially Arabic for “zing!”) Moshe was impressed.

Saturday, September 30 - Woke up and went to Shacharit, at which there was a double bar mitzvah. Ok, here comes a good story.

So Moshe is Sephardic, so the synagogue at which he davens is also Sephardic. Anyways, once the bar mitzvah aliyot started, the balcony (for the women) windows opened up and women started doing the crazy middle-eastern-Sephardic, la-la-la-la yell thing. Then they started throwing candy. Lots of candy. Candy by the kilo, and at every single moment. It was like a candyfest. Moshe explained that the candy is a status symbol; the more you have, the better your status as a family. He said that his mother bought, for his Bar Mitzvah, 15 kilos of candy. In order to understand that, allow me to convert. His mother bought 33 pounds of candy.

I was reminded of the scene in Europa, Europa! when the candy falls through the ceiling in the soviet youth school. Anyways, it was crazy, and I got tons of candy!

After all that, we had lunch, and then Ross, Elan, Moshe’s brother/sister-in-law, and I began a game of Risk, in Hebrew! I lost, but not before Moshe’s brother/sister-in-law. Ross ultimately won.

Then came Seudah Shlishit, whcih was full of figs, pineapple, bissly, rosquettes, and many other great goodies. The food just kept coming!

After Shabbat ended, Ushpizin was on TV, so we ordered pizza and watched the fantastic film. We later went back to Jerusalem, but not before nearly being killed on the way back by ridiculous Israeli drivers. Because Road 1 (the main road to Jerusalem, on which Mevaseret Tzion lies) was very backed up with traffic, we took some crazy back roads, and while Moshe was driving, we made up a ridiculous story about how the shady cars in front of us on this very narrow road were all involved in drug deals/gun running. We went on for a while about how Moshe is actually an undercover cop, and how when a guy asked us for directions to the Kotel, the word “Kotel” was actually a code word, as the other guy was also an undercover cop.

Sunday, October 1 - Wake up this morning was later, as there was no Yeshiva. We started the day with breakfast, then went to various Yom Kippur sessions. I went to Julie’s session about the Torah portions, because it was amazing for RH. It did not fail this time. I also went to Uzi’s session about fasting for Yom Kippur in relation to fasting in other religions. Both were good.

Afterwards, I made brownies in the large toaster oven on the girls’ floor, so that I would have them for the break-fast after Yom Kippur.

I prepared for Yom Kippur and went down to the pre-fast meal. Afterwards, (the fast began at 4:45) I davened at Moreshet Yisrael (the Conservative synagogue next to Beit Nativ) and then read (the service ended at 6:45) for a while before going to bed.

Monday, October 2 - Upon waking, I again attended Moreshet Yisrael. I sat next to Sarah Rader and Aaron Sherman, so that was nice. Since Aaron knew the floor usher, I received an honor, making it my third year to do so during the high holidays. I carried the second Torah around after the Torah reading. That was cool.

After Musaf ended, I spent more time reading (I’m still trying to finish John Irving’s A Prayer for Owen Meany) before heading to the Kotel for Mincha/Neilah. That was ok, and we davened with Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, the star of the TLC show, Shalom in the Home and the author of Kosher Sex. I did not know this until afterwards. Also, I’ve never really heard of either. But apparently, he’s famous.

I came back to base and ate some of my brownies. They were not fully cooked, but were fully excellent. After a day full of fasting and exhaustion, I went to sleep peacefully.

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 9 months ago (September 28, 2006 - 6 Tishrei, 5767)

Wednesday, September 20 - So services were normal, except for the few scattered “Happy Birthday” shouts that I received, which was nice. At breakfast, Debbie gave me a poem that she wrote, typed, printed, and decorated, as well as one of my favorite chocolate bars. The best part was that Debbie’s poem was flawless, spelling-wise and grammatically, which is rare for her. (Whenever we talk online, she types ridiculously. She was also proud of the flawlessness.)

Before leaving for Hebrew U, Shoshana gave me her gift for me, which was a “love-it bucket.” (Based loosely on a David Sedaris idea, found in Me Talk Pretty One Day, a fine book.) The bucket, which was heart-covered, was filled with amazing things, including chocolate, a kaleidoscope, foam animal kits (with a Triceratops!), a pan-flute, traffic sign stickers, and the best Israeli game ever, Kuku-Taki! Needless to say, I was thrilled.

Talmud was normal, but since it is my only class on Wednesdays, I was in an even better mood. Afterwards, I went back to my room to take an extended nap. Upon waking, I found a bag on the door with a note. The bag contained more chocolate, and the note was from various fellow Yeshivaniks, including Lev and Hillel and Elan.

Soon, my mom called me to wish me happy birthday, which was fantastic. It added greatly to the three birthday cards she sent me (not at the same time, which made for amusement.)

That night, we were supposed to go to the symphony, but it did not work out, since all three groups planned various things. My group planned a toga party, about which I was not thrilled. Upon arriving there, however, I found that the toga idea had been scrapped (good thing that I didn’t wear one.) Instead, there was a surprise party for me, with cupcakes and candles. It was fantastic.

After dinner, Shoshana and I went out for ice cream, which was yummy. I went to bed later that night, after a great birthday and a final room celebration with cake and more chocolate.

Thursday, September 21 - The day started out normal, with t’fillot, breakfast, and of course Talmud. We continued learning about stolen and dry lulavs, and came across this line in the Talmud: “סתם נכרים גזלני ארעתא נינהו” which basically means, “the average gentile steals land.” Needless to say, we found the line to be quite amusing, especially because it is used only to tell merchants how they should handle lulav-parts purchased from non-Jews. Rashi, however, explains that it was referring to the average Babylonian (at the time of the Talmud) who did indeed force Jews off their land.

Following that was lunch, for which Lev and I bought a chicken. The chicken was 27 shekels and was amazing. Seriously, this was possibly the best chicken I have ever eaten. Even the white meat was amazing! Lev agreed. We enjoyed the chicken thoroughly.

After that was our weekly Halacha class with Pesach, for which we discussed extramarital relationships, whether they are halachically acceptable, and whether they need a get (Jewish divorce) if they end.

After all of that Yeshiva brou-ha-ha, I took a nap, and then got ready for the highlight of the day: a Shotey Hanevua concert. I love Shotey Hanevua, and they are the one band I told myself I had to see this year. The concert was amazing; I got great pictures and even better videos. Those pictures are available here. I’ll figure out a way to circulate the videos later.

The concert was fantastic, and I recommend the band immensely.

Friday, September 22 - A late wake-up was great, but the day ahead proved crazy. Because it was the day before Rosh Hashana, we did not blow the shofar. I learned why: Apparently, in order to fool Satan (the prosecuting angel, not the Christian idea of a devil), we don’t blow the Shofar the day before RH, so that he’ll think he missed his opportunity to tell God of all the evil we’ve done during the last year.

This is a dumb idea. Even if we could fool an angel once, or even twice, there’s no way he hasn’t figured it out by now. Come on man.

Anyways, after t’fillot, we began “Rosh Hashana Workshops.” First I learned about the Torah from Julie, then I learned about the Shofar from Jesse, and finally, I learned about food customs from Yael.

After that, I went with Ross to Mister Zol to buy some things before RH. Then we both (with Yoni Saadi) went to Pomeranz books to purchase Machzors (prayerbooks for the high holidays.)

Soon, the holiday started. Hillel and I got downstairs early, so we didn’t realize that the davening room had been changed from the auditorium to the Etrog room. We hung out in the auditorium for a while, then finally got up and explored, finding that people were starting to come into the Etrog room. We joined them and Nahum davened Ma’ariv. Quite nice.

We then had a great dinner, with all kinds of crazy RH foods, including: Leeks, celery, pomegranates, apples w/honey, challah w/honey, carrots, dates, and (crazy, I know) fish-heads. In addition, we had brisket and leg-thigh-combos, and soup, all of which were great.

Then it was time for some games of Kuku-Taki! Shoshana and I taught the game to Jeremy Slosberg (a funny guy from Louisville), Cynthia, and Uzi (one of our staffers). Uzi started out by saying “this looks like a game for five year olds” and ended the night saying “this is the best game ever!” Jeremy also was loving it, as he has an uncanny ability to make animal noises, which is an integral part of the game.

Then it was bedtime. Shana tova u’metuka.

Saturday, September 23 - Day one of Rosh Hashana. Several of us decided to go to Kedem, because it’s egalitarian (I can’t do a 4+ hour service in a room of only men…) and because it’s not too far. In Israel, you don’t need tickets to get into High Holiday services. This is a plus.

Anyways, during the service, I got bored, so I counted the number of people in the room. It was a small room. There were 87 people. There were also three pianos. This was far too many pianos. I remarked such a thing to the people around me. “There is an excess of pianos in this room,” I stated. I began calculating the proportion of pianos to people, having it come out at 1:29. I determined that this was too high of a piano to person ratio. A good number, in my opinion, is 1:5000. Once the service was over, we walked back to Beit Nativ for lunch, which consisted of more meat. I was happy.

After lunch, I spent some time relaxing and hanging out with others. We played a little Kuku-Taki, and then got ready for Mincha at Moreshet Yisrael (the Conservative synagogue attached to Beit Nativ.) Here is my story:

So Dub (Shayna) and Gita and I were sitting together in the back of the synagogue. These two guys walk in wearing matching clothes and matching weird red kippot. They sit three rows in front of us, stay for five minutes, then leave. A few minutes later, this elder woman comes to us and starts talking: “Do you know what those two men were asking me? All kinds of questions: why do the men sit with the women, do they touch each other, is there a microphone, when were the lights turned on, why do some people drive here? I tried to tell them that some people drive because they can’t get to synagogue otherwise. We had a man here this morning who is 93 years old! So what if he takes a taxi? Another man was just out of the hospital, after four months! And they only care about the lights! That’s not what this is about! If it’s only about the rituals to you, you’re coming here for the wrong reasons! You know?” She kind of reminded me of Maude, à la Harold and Maude. Anyways, she told us that she was the Usher there every Shabbat and that she looks forward to seeing us there. Of course, I had already planned to daven Yom Kippur there (no walk, close to my bed, air conditioned, similar to home, etc.) but her friendliness increased the desire. She told us to call her “Savta,” and that’s the story of how Dub and Gita and I met our new Savta. The rest of the day, in comparison to this story, is unimportant.

Sunday, September 24 - Day two of Rosh Hashana. This day, the plan was for Kibbutz and Kehila 2 to go to the Talpiyot area to two synagogues (Moreshet Avraham and Mayanot) and then afterwards, go to various host homes for lunch. I was assigned to a family at Mayanot, so that’s where I went. I sat next to Ilana Shalowitz and Shoshana. (Ah the joys of the few egalitarian synagogues in Israel…) Anyways, after a long, hot service (the synagogue was run out of a gym attached to a school, so like other low-budget Israeli Conservative synagogues, it was hot and only cooled by a few fans), I joined Nehama and Abi for our trek to the Abramowitz household.

While walking, I suddenly realized that both Abi and Nehama were vegetarians. This did not bode well for me. When we arrived at the household, the mother had to go to the hospital as she cut herself on glass. The father, therefore, was in charge of giving us our lunch.

We sat down and ate: sushi (yum), salad (not the best kinds… not yum), and fish quiche (you heard me. not in the least bit yum). Needless to say, this carnatarian was not thrilled. In addition, the guy, whom we found out is an encryptionist for a tech company, told us little else and did not contribute greatly to conversation.

Upon arriving back at Mayanot at 4 (as we were supposed to do), we waited until 4:45 for the last stragglers to arrive. Once they did, Yossi took us to the tayelet for tashlich. Tashlich in Israel includes no bread and doesn’t really include water. This is because we can’t afford to clog natural water with bread, and Jerusalem is on no natural water (like Dallas.) We also did Mincha at this time.

After arriving back to Beit Nativ, we chilled out until Ma’ariv and Havdalah. After that, I went to bed relatively early.

Monday, September 25 - Back to the normal Yeshiva schedule. Tanach in the morning, which was about various tribes killing other tribes. I made a “TribeChart” which I then trademarked. It was quite useful. However, the class is quite boring and poorly-taught, and I dislike it severely. Moshe called me in the middle of class (my phone is always on vibrate though, because I hate the idea of a ringtone, so it was not disruptive) and I walked away to talk to him. Seems that he planned for all of his kids (SWEmtza - 14 kids) to go to his house on Wednesday. He asked me to spread the word.

After Tanach, I had a sandwich with Mickey and Gita. Many people were fasting because it was Tzom Gedalia, but I think that that particular “minor fast” is minor for a reason. (Namely: it is crap.) As a result, I was not fasting. Anyways, after that, Mickey and I decided to watch a film. She had many good movies, but we decided on Good Morning Vietnam. Many people joined, and it became a Good Morning Vietnam fest!

At 3, we all left base to go to Shuk Machane Yehuda for Kaparot. Allow me to explain: it is a crazy custom to take a live chicken, transfer your sins to it by saying a bunch of stuff, waving it over your head, then ritually (kosherly) killing it. Many of us did so. We did not kill the chickens, the shochet did. It was crazy.

Then we walked around the Shuk, and I bought two kilos of Marzipan chocolate rugelach, since the shuk is usually off limits to us, due to security warnings. Afterwards, I went back to base and took a shower, and got dressed, preparing for a date with Shoshana.

We went out to a place called Limonim (Lemons in Hebrew) to celebrate our year-and-a-half anniversary (the day before). The restaurant was secluded, nice, and quite good. I had salmon in a white wine and lemon sauce and Shoshana had some chicken dish. All was lemony. Then we had this amazing “hot chocolate cake” with passion fruit sorbet on the side. Fantastiche!

Since I was sick for a week (and still sick), I set a bedtime for myself at 11 pm. I then went to bed at said time.

Tuesday, September 26 - Talmud was interesting. We discussed how to deal with a stolen sukkah. Afterwards, we had lunch at Beit Nativ, which was schnitzel and which was fantastic. I love schnitzel.

After that, Hillel and I went across the street to get laundry detergent. But we could find none. They only had powder (odd) and small bottles for expensive prices. So we went down to Gan Sacher to the Mister Zol there. We got what we thought was a nice sized bottle of detergent, and Hillel attempted to exchange traveler’s checks to cash. The guy behind the counter of the cash place was odd and kept making weird conversations, so that was an experience.

We got back and went to Matt’s class. Sarah and Gabe, we found out, dropped the class and switched to another class, because they couldn’t deal with the philosophy element of the class. Anyways, Gita and I read stuff by this guy Mendelssohn, who tried to rationalize Judaism. Essentially, as Matt taught us, his works were eventually used to start the reform movement, and all of his grandchildren (one of whom was the famous composer) converted out of Judaism. Sad.

After class was over, I chilled out with everyone, and since I had the Aristocrats (not Disney’s Aristocats), a bunch of us decided to watch it. That was awesome. Afterwards, I went to bed before 11 again, which I think is greatly improving my health situation.

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 9 months ago (September 20, 2006 - 27 Elul, 5766)

Sunday, September 17 - Because we begged Annie (one of our staff, who is also studying at Yeshiva), she got permission for us to go to Yeshiva T’fillot, which begin at 8, instead of the normal Nativ t’fillot at 7:30. Afterwards, we had breakfast, and then Yeshiva began. During Talmud, I gained a permanent chevruta, Elan Green, for the rest of the year. Lunch was terrible, as it was the second to last day of the caterer at Beit Nativ. (Apparently, over the summer, the caterer was fired and replaced, the transition would occur on the 18th.)

Following lunch was Ulpan and then Kabbalah, where I learned that (apparently) Shimon Bar Yochai is likely not the author of the Zohar. Needless to say, this dismayed me greatly. Allegedly a group of various Kabbalists wrote it, much more recently.

After Yeshiva ended, we had another Conservative Judaism class with Jules, and after that, Shoshana, Avram, and Mike (one of our staff) and I went out to dinner at a Chinese place near Emek. It was quite good.

Monday, September 18 - After T’fillot was the worst breakfast ever. Clearly, on the last day of the caterer, they did not care about impressing us. Yeshiva began with Tanach, during which I was chevruta with Lev.

For lunch, Josh and I walked to SuperSol and bought some Salami, from which we made sandwiches. We also went next door to the cheap convenience store with a small selection for chips, because they are much cheaper there. In addition, as we were looking at the chips, I found the greatest find of my life, for only 8 shekels: A 12-ounce can of Dr Pepper. That’s right, even though Dr Pepper doesn’t export to Israel, I managed to find a (direct from Plano, American-12-ounce-shaped can) wonderful Dr Pepper. Sure, it was a bit expensive, but I couldn’t resist.

Because we had no Ulpan, Gita and I set out on a mission to find the object of our desire: the Timeline featured in our favorite study spot in the Yeshiva. The Timeline features Jewish history from creation to now, and divides it into periods such as the Tannaim, Amorim, etc. Because it is useful and colorful, we decided we needed copies. So we started by walking to Pomeranz books. The guy told us that he could order it for us, but first we decided to try various bookstores in Me’a She’arim. Unfortunately, we had no luck. So we walked back to Pomeranz, where the guy said he’d order it for us. Gita then asked about the books for the Yeshiva that we ordered, and the guy said that he had them available. We offered to carry them back, because we were a little late for class, and it would give us an excuse. So we did so, and in addition, the guy gave each of us a free Yom Ha’atzmaut Siddur, which, although it’s useful only one day a year, is pretty cool.

Anyways, basically, I had to carry about 90 pounds of books (10 Steinsaltz Baba Kamas) about a half of a mile. It caused me immense pain. I then joined my liturgy class and joined Lev and Hillel’s chevruta. However, because external people kept asking me questions, and because I had lost all muscle control in my arms, Hillel called it a “stabuta” which is an abbreviation for “stupid chevruta.”

Muscle control: So basically, while trying to wipe sweat off of my brow, my intensely abused muscles spasmed and I slapped myself in the face. Later, when I was trying to eat a burger at that evening’s barbecue, I accidentally threw the meat at myself (I had no bun), and it fell on the ground. I was not happy.

Following all that, we again had a session with Jules, who, afterward, took the board (Matan, Sarah, Jacob and I) and the IC co-chairs (Ross and Josh) out for a steak dinner. That was fun.

Tuesday, September 19 - Another basically normal day. Breakfast was amazing, meaning that there was a huge spread. Clearly the new caterer has pulled all the stops. We finally began studying the Gemara in Talmud (instead of just the Mishnah), which was hard, but stimulating. Lunch was great, with chicken. In Ulpan, among the words I learned was פטריה (pitriyah) which means mushroom. Because it rhymes with the word for umbrella (מטריה - mitriyah), I sang (in my head) a song from this summer, “מטריה בשניים” (”Umbrella for two.”)

After all that was “Judaism and Modernity,” to which I will refer, in the future, as “Matt’s class.” We read some things by Baruch Spinoza and had an interesting discussion.

Following that was the final class of Conservative Judaism by Jules. Afterwards, Hillel, Leora, Cynthia, Shoshana, and I went to Café Hillel for an early birthday celebration. Cynthia and Leora bought me two chocolate cubes, which are the best things ever.

After that, I took a Night-Time Cold Pill because I am sick. Before going to bed, Andy (who was not in the room at the time) called me at midnight and sang Happy Birthday.

Posted by Nathan Miller, 2 years, 9 months ago (September 17, 2006 - 24 Elul, 5766)

Wednesday, September 13 - Yeshiva today was a short schedule. It started with Talmud, which continued study on the Mishnah of Sukkot, and then it ended! After Talmud, I did not have Ulpan, and there is no scheduled class for Wednesday afternoon (eventually, it will be community service time), so I went out to lunch with Cynthia, who also had no classes.

We decided to go to Emek Refaim but turned the wrong direction and ended up on Ben Yehuda. So we turned around and went back to Emek, finally deciding to eat at Café Hillel (always a favorite), which was ridiculous, since there is another Café Hillel on BY. We both had salads and then we split one of the 4.5 shekel chocolate cubes. They are the best.

Afterwards, we came back to Beit Nativ, where there was a “mitzvah fair” to display various places at which we could volunteer during the year. Following that, our group split into a “girls’ night/boys’ night” in which we ate pizza and watched the Big Lebowski. Heck yes.

Thursday, September 14 - After Talmud, in which Avram and I owned the Mishnah (we predicted accurately the explanation for a mishnah, which then came two pasukim later), we ate lunch and then headed to a Nativ-only class led by one of the Roshei Yeshiva, Rabbi Pesach Schindler. The class was on Modern Halacha and was great. Then came Mincha and a nap for me.

After my extended nap, all of Nativ left for “the Sultan’s pool,” a venue where we saw Barry Sacharof, a great Israeli rock artist. (Last year, I purchased his album, Negiot.)

Friday, September 15 - After a late wake-up, we began our Nativ sessions on Conservative Judaism led by Jules Gutin. Most of the session was introduction, and as a result, many people were obnoxious. To add to the dismay, by attending this mandatory session, we Yeshiva kids missed the tiyul (hike) of the Shabbaton upon which we were to embark after the session.

After the session, we did so. We drove to Massada, where we were staying (in the Youth Hostel there) and began a Shabbaton with all of the Yeshiva students. I roomed with Lev Zuckerman, Hillel Konigsberg (whose great aunt is E.L.), and Jacob Slosberg. We had t’fillot in an extremely hot room, listened to a D’var Torah, ate a good dinner, and had a fantastic Tisch.

During dinner, we shared the dining room with a group of high school students from Netanya, who were wild. Rabbi Goldfarb referred to them as “the Huns,” as they were loud and disrespectful. Eh.

Saturday, September 16 - Upon waking, we joined t’fillot, which was followed by another shiur. After lunch was Mincha, followed by a large amount of free time, which I wisely utilized by napping. Following my nap, we had Seudah Shlishit, another shiur, Ma’ariv, Havdallah, and bus-loading.

There was a snafu with the bus-company, so we (the Nativers) thought we didn’t have a bus. In reality, this was true. We were told another bus would be coming soon. Many of us got up and pretended to walk out of the door, and Rabbi Diamond freaked out and yelled at us. Eventually we got a bus, and got back to the base.

Then it was time for slichot services. I went, with Josh and Gabe, to the Great Synagogue, which was great, to say the least.

I came back to receive two pieces of mail! Yay! Send more!